Saturday, May 14, 2011

Remembering The Old Human Touch

Every finger was made for your delight, to follow the curve of your face, here next to mine. All of your secrets are safe. Can I taste your perfume? Oh I could just linger here for days and melt with you. We can use love on our side. And I could use your affection tonight. Love was made just for us. Human touch. - Kem

It’s 4:22am and I’m up thinking about love. I’m thinking about the rush I felt when my lover was far away and I couldn’t feel the energy of his hand. I remember when I used to watch him in the small moments we had together, imagining what unlimited time would be like with him. The feelings that came over me ran the show. I was overwhelmed with passion and want. I needed him so bad. His human touch. His eyes searching out mine. His loving kisses on my check. It’s 4:29am and I still remember the times when I’d cry for his presence. In our separate corners, we tried to reconnect. Nothing could fulfill the want other than actual human touch. Time was against us as we tried to savor the remaining seconds. Separating was like death. We held on to the last hug like the last drop of water in a desert atmosphere. But it was never enough. We wanted each other too much. It’s 4:34am and I’m trying to live out that passion as it was then. No love has been lost. There’s more of it to grab a hold of. Real love, live in color. The everyday manifestations of it are so apparent. Discovering the present with memories of the past are the desires of my soul. Understanding the need for old passion in the here and now. The daily routine is my enemy. I’m thinking about the human touch that used to be so desperate. Wondering if you can have newness inside of the old. Now that he’s here, I miss it when he would leave. It’s 4:45am and I’m up thinking about love.

Tuesday, May 03, 2011

Why I Appreciate My Religion

I've been having difficulties understanding the deep stuff that I've been reading so in an effort not to get side-tracked into discouragement, I'm remembering the reasons I appreciate my religion.

1. Because I've learned more than I have anywhere else.
2. Because my sisters and brothers inside and out of the congregation care for me more than most people. Due to their love for me, and mine for them, they'll do anything for me.
3. Because I can go to Japan and hook up with a sister/brother and be just as close as I would with a sister/brother in my own congregation. That international brotherhood is amazing.
4. Because I have an amazing husband that I know only came as a result of obedience to Jehovah.
5. Because I don't have diseases like STDs or AIDS that I could have contracted if I didn't understand that being Christ like means putting a stop to fornication.
6. Because knowing my God and His Son has given me a greater sense of happiness and peace.
7. Because of the resurrection hope that so many people either don't know about or don't believe. Even if someone I know dies or I myself pass away, I can have hope being that I know the resurrection is real.
8. Because I know the truth about why this world is the way it is and what the eventuality is concerning a new paradise. Having the knowledge makes it easier to deal with this crazy society. The promise of paradise makes it all worth it.
9. Because I've grown closer to seeing how fantastic Jesus was as a man.
10. Because at the end of the day, I know that Jehovah loves me for the efforts and strives that I've made in His service. Otherwise, I wouldn't be so blessed. To have peace, a clean conscience, a Christian brotherhood all over the world, a loving marriage and so much more... Jehovah definitely has EVERYTHING to do with that. I KNOW that He loves me and is taking care of me as one of His children.
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