The Thing

As you get older and you look back on your childhood, you know how you begin to wonder how your parents did it all? How they afforded the school supplies, the hair appointments, the trips to amusement parks, the vacations, etc...Yeah well, I think I'm beginning to get it. It's called 'Make It Work'. I don't know why I decided to throw a bridal shower while unemployed, but if this is how it works, I just might be able to handle it. I might have the thing necessary to raise children.

Looking For Hope

Music Video: Yazarah "Where I Is"

Through The Fire

Things are really hard right now. I have these internal wars going on inside of me. One day I'm fine, and the next I'm laying down staring at the ceiling, praying that everything will eventually be okay. I feel like I'm being tested from every possible angle. Career, relationships, etc. There's some kind of fight going on in every important area of my life, but I'm going to keep my feet planted firmly. I'm not one to run away from challenges. I believe they make you a better person. They sharpen and refine you and make you stronger than you previously were. As long as I'm grounded and I follow what I know to be right, things will turn out alright. I have to trust that.

Faith

...do I have it? I'd like to say that I do, but there are times when I feel like a peg in the dirt that keeps getting pounded deeper into the ground. This job situation has sincerely got my head spinning and there's absolutely nothing that I can do about it. I go on interview after interview and just when I think there's something at the end of the fishing line, I come up empty. It's incredible how a person can try to live their life well or come out of school with an excellent education, and still yet feel like they're living at the bottom of the trash barrel. I'm trying to hold on, but I feel the widening crack in my spirit.

I keep praying that Jehovah help me to remember that I can trust in Him. Of course I know that to be a fact, but when my thoughts get to going... I don't know where this road is leading me, but I pray that I can hold on. I am just so tired.