Wednesday, August 12, 2009

To Move or Not To Move

I want to move out.
Safe mode at the parent's house is cool but I need to learn some lessons.
I don't feel like I'm growing at home.
I'm rather stagnant and a little bored.
Challenges are interesting.
Even if I don't overcome each one to the best of my ability, I feed off of them.
Challenges help me evolve.
The b side of things tells me to sit tight.
Avoid challenges.
Be safe.
I'm not sure what to do.
If I move out, I need to do it now.
There's not much time to mull this over.
I'm not 100% responsible for anything at home.
I definitely could do more in my parent's house to help, but it's mentally difficult when you know your parents are going to take care of it anyway.
Especially when my timeline is different from my mom's.
What she sees as dirty ("OMG, the whole house needs a big bleaching!"), I don't.
I want to get back into the mode of cleaning and cooking...
I need to get my responsible swag back.
I can't do that at 2001.
Living alone automatically raises your levels.
You rise to the occassion.
You handle business.
I would be so much more on point if I moved out.
What's the smarter move?
Stay and pay off debt.
Stay and avoid even the INKLING of compromising situations that could arise with my bf.
What's best for my spirituality?
Mmm.
That question doesn't really help.
My spirituality isn't tied to my parents so no matter where I am, my desire will be the same.
My relationship with Jehovah is not contigent upon where I am.
That's a beautiful thought, by the way.
There's not one person or one solitary place can separate me from Him.
What to do, what to do?
I guess my next step is to toss the idea around with the ones who love me.
Not too many people.
Just a select few.
I can't handle five different opinions.
I would get lost in what everyone else thinks instead of the two people that matter the most.
The man upstairs and me.
"There is a frustrating of plans where there is no confidential talk, but in the multitude of counselors there is accomplishment." - Prov. 15:22

Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry

2 comments:

T.C. said...

i say stay at home until at least the end of the year-pay off debt and start to save for the wedding...if you two are seriously thinking about marriage then i would stay and save for the wedding/house at this point there is no rush in moving out especially if marriage is in your future just a lil food for thought

Deja~I~Am said...

wow TC. I never though of it like that. TRUE TRUE. snap snap

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