How are you supposed to know yourself well enough at 18 years old to pick a major that's going to stay with you for the rest of your life? I don't understand that. How can colleges request that you narrow in on a specific field during a time in your life when you're just beginning to figure out what kind of cereal you want to buy, and not what your parents always bought and fed you? Why do colleges force you to do that?! In my humble opinion, that is SO WRONG of them! I blame college. Shoo. I blame my parents.
I somehow was smart enough to study two disciplines; economics and dance. But my question is why was I never encouraged to pursue dance (or another art form) when I clearly got better grades in it. I wrote better papers. I had better ideas. I had a keener appreciation. I had more joy. So why didn't my parents point that out? Why didn't they lead me down an artsy path instead of pushing me to pursue finance? My hypothesis: It was because of their own selfish reasons. They didn't want to assist in supporting me as an artsy person. Finance paid more so they led me into their own personal financial freedom. At least that's what I believe. I totally could be wrong though. I was their first child in college. Maybe I didn't display any artsy qualities. Maybe they just didn't know. This is why I sometimes hate that I was the quiet child. I wasn't as expressive as I wished I was. My parents would have seen something different if I was. I just texted my mother and asked why I wasn't led down an artsy path. We'll see if my hypothesis is true.
I just totally hate where my life has taken me in terms of career...which is why I'm blaming the world. I simply hate it. I want to change careers so bad. I want to start all over from scratch and go to school for interior design with a minor in photography. I looked at how much an intro to interior design would cost at Corcoran College of Art and Design... $2,700. smh. I feel so defeated. It's like the world's forces want me to stay miserable. Why isn't it easier to switch careers mid stream? It makes me feel like my formative years were a waste. Of course I know I got something out of it. I'm a better thinker, I have deductive reasoning skills, I can handle finances, I can manage a project, I have organizational skills... I still wish I had done more.
I need to take this feeling and do something with it... I have to think...