My Key To A Happy Marriage

Hubby and I have been on some high level cloud this past week and a half. Happier than the happiest in love fools. But we weren't always like that.

We have been the type of couple that goes in on each other. And what I mean by 'go in' is making fun of. We shake our heads at each other in joking disapproval, laughingly jab at each other on any number of topics and all around do our best to trump the other in the jonin' department. But as of lately, I made the announcement that I'm tired. The jokes, the undercuts, the lack of seriousness...I just wasn't feeling it anymore. At least not for every second of the day.

I have a fascination with the word 'nice'. definition - pleasing; agreeable; delightful; amiably pleasant; kind  I haven't figured out why just yet, but it's something that's been with me for a very long time. In fact, I'm so fascinated with it that I becoming overwhelmingly touched when people display the quality. Case and point...we were watching an old Sandra Bullock movie (i LOVE her) and there was this female character that had my heart as soon as she spoke her first line. She didn't know Sandra's character, but as soon as she saw her, she reached out and asked her to join her. I thought that was so sweet. There's something really special about people who reach out to strangers and make them feel loved and comfortable. I wish the world was like that.

Anyway, to continue with my story, hubby and I have been practicing this quality for the past week and a half, and to our surprise, we are totally elated. Even him! Sweet gestures, looks of love, kind words...Yes! We're in heaven! The power of being nice is very strong and very real. Instead of having my boxing gloves cocked up in fighting stance in perpetuity, I'm wide open accepting every love vibe that comes my way. But don't be mislead. Being nice takes strength. It's a very hard thing to do. Vulnerability is required and that's not an easy be any stretch of the imagination. You never know how someone is going to accept your unguarded offerings. You might get socked in the face, especially in this day and age, and even by people you love the most.

I've learned a very important lesson about relationships, especially in marriage regarding niceties. As Otis Redding says (cue Jay and 'Ye), "And it makes it easier to bear/Oh she won't regret it/Them young girls they don't forget it/Love is their whole happiness/But it's all so easy/All you got to do is try/Try a little tenderness!"