Zuri (Beautiful) She Wrote - I'm a brown-skinned lady whose life’s purpose is to inspire. Whether it be through words, art, the Bible or photos, I believe that I have a voice that needs to be heard.
Wednesday, June 04, 2008
STRESSED
I'm so stressed today. I'm doing all I can not to lose my mind. My director is driving me crazy, it's dark and rainy outside, I only have one of me to do all of this work... Lord please help me get through this day!
stop, take a deep breathe...listen to your favorite song, and remember your favoritie moment...think about your blessings and just know that the work will be there...
Entries like this remind me of how similarly we think at times. I've always had issues with people telling me things I know or think I know because I'm often underestimated. I know how I can come off and it makes me feel like I have something to prove. I think your situation is a little different, but I think a recent revelation that I've had will help you greatly as well.
Pride is thinking more of yourself than you are. According to Proverbs, it's one of six things the Almighty hates and a prideful person is worse off than a fool (because pride is blinding.) The thing that's tricky about pride is that it doesn't always manifest itself in obvious ways. Pride is what makes us, at 24 and 25 years old, think that we already know what our elders are thinking when they give us information they've already given us. It's what allows us to assume that we've somehow deduced (in the 20 minute to 2 hour conversations we've had on a certain topic) every single piece of information and experience that these elders could possibly convey to us.
I don't know if you've ever worked with kids extensively, outside of Kiamsha, but even within the organization you may be able to relate. I've noticed that there are many times where I can't get the right words out to really get across to these kids what I'm trying to get across, so I end up repeating myself, and they end up shutting their ears thinking that they've heard it all before. They don't consider the possibility that there might be something else that I'm trying to get in their heads. The reason experience is the best teacher is because we can't always convey everything in an experience through words. That's why, in most cases, it's best to just trust the wisdom that comes from others' experience that they relay through their advice.
Like I said, we're a lot alike. I'm telling you all this because I think I have an idea of what may be going on in your head behind the scenes. A big assumption, I know, but hear me out. Being as strong, intelligent, and capable as you are, with a bit of an inclination to want to prove yourself, this sentence raises some concern:
"To quote them, they said that it is "bittersweet" because while they're happy for me they know the valleys that marriage brings and wonder if I'm strong enough. Yes, there is a lot of joy and pain in marriage. It's a fact. And you better believe that I've thought about this. Why say yes if I haven't?"
Again, the definition of pride is thinking more of yourself or your abilities than what's real. You may respond to the idea of this being an issue of pride by quoting the next few sentences that go on to speak about how you're going to ask for advice when you are married, but pride's sneaky. Let me ask you this:
When mentioning that they wonder if you're strong enough, you admit that there's a lot of pain and what not in marriage, and make the point that you would've thought about that before saying yes. Did you ever consider that perhaps you don't fully understand what you may not be "Strong enough" for? Have you considered what it would take to get strong enough? Why would you be against waiting until you had it?
I'm not trying to rain on your parade, homie. I'm really happy that you've found someone who you think is worthy of getting married to. I'm JUBILANT!!! :-) It gives me hope. And I know how capable, strong, intelligent, and wise you are, but, as I've learned about myself, people with a lot of wisdom at a young age can easily forget where that wisdom came from in the first place: People who have already been there, or mistakes we've made because we didn't learn from the people who had already been there.
If you're going to do this thang, why not know for sure that you're ready? I love ya, and I'm happy for ya, sis. Keep the Almighty first in everything, and I'm sure you'll be fine.
Peace, Kep.
P.S.: Have you ever had the experience of a Bible verse that you've read a million times having a whole new meeting when you've read it a new time around after having some experience? It kind of works the same way with the advice of elders. Some things just come with time, you know?
2 comments:
stop, take a deep breathe...listen to your favorite song, and remember your favoritie moment...think about your blessings and just know that the work will be there...
Entries like this remind me of how similarly we think at times. I've always had issues with people telling me things I know or think I know because I'm often underestimated. I know how I can come off and it makes me feel like I have something to prove. I think your situation is a little different, but I think a recent revelation that I've had will help you greatly as well.
Pride is thinking more of yourself than you are. According to Proverbs, it's one of six things the Almighty hates and a prideful person is worse off than a fool (because pride is blinding.) The thing that's tricky about pride is that it doesn't always manifest itself in obvious ways. Pride is what makes us, at 24 and 25 years old, think that we already know what our elders are thinking when they give us information they've already given us. It's what allows us to assume that we've somehow deduced (in the 20 minute to 2 hour conversations we've had on a certain topic) every single piece of information and experience that these elders could possibly convey to us.
I don't know if you've ever worked with kids extensively, outside of Kiamsha, but even within the organization you may be able to relate. I've noticed that there are many times where I can't get the right words out to really get across to these kids what I'm trying to get across, so I end up repeating myself, and they end up shutting their ears thinking that they've heard it all before. They don't consider the possibility that there might be something else that I'm trying to get in their heads. The reason experience is the best teacher is because we can't always convey everything in an experience through words. That's why, in most cases, it's best to just trust the wisdom that comes from others' experience that they relay through their advice.
Like I said, we're a lot alike. I'm telling you all this because I think I have an idea of what may be going on in your head behind the scenes. A big assumption, I know, but hear me out. Being as strong, intelligent, and capable as you are, with a bit of an inclination to want to prove yourself, this sentence raises some concern:
"To quote them, they said that it is "bittersweet" because while they're happy for me they know the valleys that marriage brings and wonder if I'm strong enough. Yes, there is a lot of joy and pain in marriage. It's a fact. And you better believe that I've thought about this. Why say yes if I haven't?"
Again, the definition of pride is thinking more of yourself or your abilities than what's real. You may respond to the idea of this being an issue of pride by quoting the next few sentences that go on to speak about how you're going to ask for advice when you are married, but pride's sneaky. Let me ask you this:
When mentioning that they wonder if you're strong enough, you admit that there's a lot of pain and what not in marriage, and make the point that you would've thought about that before saying yes. Did you ever consider that perhaps you don't fully understand what you may not be "Strong enough" for? Have you considered what it would take to get strong enough? Why would you be against waiting until you had it?
I'm not trying to rain on your parade, homie. I'm really happy that you've found someone who you think is worthy of getting married to. I'm JUBILANT!!! :-) It gives me hope. And I know how capable, strong, intelligent, and wise you are, but, as I've learned about myself, people with a lot of wisdom at a young age can easily forget where that wisdom came from in the first place: People who have already been there, or mistakes we've made because we didn't learn from the people who had already been there.
If you're going to do this thang, why not know for sure that you're ready? I love ya, and I'm happy for ya, sis. Keep the Almighty first in everything, and I'm sure you'll be fine.
Peace,
Kep.
P.S.: Have you ever had the experience of a Bible verse that you've read a million times having a whole new meeting when you've read it a new time around after having some experience? It kind of works the same way with the advice of elders. Some things just come with time, you know?
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