Every Job Comes With Challenges

There's a lot going on it seems and I'm beginning to feel the stress ball that I've managed to avoid for a few months now. Since my wedding, this have been pretty quiet and calm, but as we know, nothing lasts forever.

I took a lazy job, one that would allow me to sit down and do nothing for a while. I was tired of the grind and decided that being a receptionist was the job for me. One would think that this would be a piece of cake for me. Wrong. I feel trapped. The company has a small business mindset that could use a boost. I try to sit here quietly while things go arry all the whilst recalling solutions from my past experiences that I KNOW could be of assistance, but it's driving me crazy. What makes it even worse is that I'm afraid to voice my suggestions. You see... the back door (the one I man) is a revolving door. In the three months that I've been here, over six employees have been fired. Three here, one there, two over there... It's quite creepy to be exact. When someone is suddenly escorted to the door after putting in hours of weekday and weekend labor, everyone in the office who is not in the know, is shocked. We're never told why or given a memo on lessons learned so in all of our ignorance, the rest of us keep our heads down. If I'm keeping track, it seems like the most assertive and outspoken employees are the ones who get drop-kicked to the door. So if I suggest that they toss some of their load my way in order to get bills paid on time, will I be fired as well? I'm not working with the most humble and open-minded employers, so I'm not too easy about sharing my knowledge. I don't want to jeapordize my job.

I need to work on moving towards my next job. I want to stay here for a minute while I take classes that'll prepare me to take on a new industry, but I don't know how much longer I can sit quietly. After the saddening phone call that I got yesterday, I'm motivated to make a change. Maybe my lesson here is to bite my lip. That's what my co-worker told me to do. But if I know that having weekly staff meetings will benefit the production of the company, should I hold that in? Aren't we supposed to lift each other up towards success? Of course I don't know for sure that they would reject it, but from what I see, it's dangerous to even try. Should I take the gamble?

One thing is for sure, it's much easier to find a job while having one. It's time to start looking. I've taken classes while having a full time busy job and I know that I could do it again. I'm up for the challenge.

Every job comes with challenges. Even a simple receptionist position. I keep saying how perfect my Essence Magazine job was but upon reading a few of my old posts, I was reminded that it wasn't all roses. What I keep holding on to, however, is that I don't really remember many of the hard times. As a whole, the experience was wonderful. It was a well-matched job and I miss it. Ever since Essence, I've been trying to find another well-matched job. I had the wrong viewpoint for a moment in thinking that the next job I take should be a breeze if I really love it. Every job comes with its challenges.

I envy people like my husband who love what they do. He has such a zeal for his job. He doesn't have to give himself a pep talk in the morning to do his job. He yearns to assist people with their information technology issues. He likes being the one they need as he has the knowledge to fulfill their requests. He's confident in what he does and no one can tell him that he's not the best in what he does. Not many people have that. How am I going to find my happy pocket when all I know is finance, excel spreadsheets and numbers?

I hate the time when career planning becomes the number one topic on my mind...but here it goes again. I have to figure this out.

Lauryn? Is That You?

New Music!!!! "Repercussions" Click here to listen. I'm so happy!

Music

One of the new interns walked by earlier and said that I need to smile because I always look mad. Maybe so. Every minute of the day feels like an hour here. Michael Jackson's "Rock With You" just came on. That makes me feel like someone is looking out for me. =/ *sigh* What to do...what to do... I need to take a trip to Office Depot and secure a scrapbook and some art supplies. I'm tired of sitting here doing nothing.

Dionne Farris' "Hopeless" from the Love Jones soundtrack is now on. "They say I'm hopeless!" I love this song. Smooth jazzy grown folks sounds... Why haven't any directors and producers caught on to the fact that we need some more films like that? Black love...Why hasn't anyone heard our cries? I need to write the director of Love Jones a letter. What's his name? Theodore Witcher. What have you been doing slacker!? What's the lady's name who did Love & Basketball and Something New? What's she doing now-a-days?! Come on people!

I love how Erykah's "A.D. 2000" goes from left to right in my ears. "No you won't be naming no buildings after me. My name will be mistated. Surely." Did anyone ever notice that the sound goes back and forth from the right speaker to the left? I love that. I'm looking forward to seeing her soon. Oh goodness, and now Anita Baker's "Body and Soul" is on! "What have you done to me? I cannot eat. I cannot sleep." Yes! This is my favorite genre of music. You see the constant stream that runs through these songs that I've mentioned. Mature, jazzy, soulful music. Music that comes from the heart. Music that I can close my eyes too.

I'm finding that my husband and I have different tastes in music. He's more so into the new pop stuff. The Dreams, Omarions and such. He gravitates to it. I like them too, but only in doses. I can listen to smooth, urban soul all day long. Jill Scott, D'Angelo, Erykah, Prince and the like. Stuff that speaks truth. I'm so over the amazingly sexed up music of today. For example, there's something about Ciara's "Ride" that bothers me. I guess it's because I know the video was too sexual and consequently was banned from BET. Come on now... from BET!? Now you know! She must have been naked if that was the case. I don't understand what's up with all the sexual overtones now-a-days. I can't even support Ciara's fresh behind no more. She gets younger and more immature to me. Goodness I sound old.

Mary is on. I'm attracted to music with actual instrumentation. Drums, bass guitars and such. But certain music is good for varying moments. The repetitive house beat that Black Eyed Peas throws out there is perfect for working out and dancing to. Jazz music is great to cool out to. Maimouna Youssef is great when you're with a bunch of people who appreciate her sounds. And even Soulja Boy's "Pretty Boy Swag" is cool when the kids are in the club doing the newest dance all in happy unity. Whatever promotes peace right?

Speaking of my main man... "I might break the law round here cause your beauty gives one pause." Go 'head Prince. "I just can't stop writing songs about you! I love you so much!" Wow. I haven't heard Musiq's "143" in a while. Remember when this CD was on heavy rotation!? Everyone loved Musiq's first CD. What's happening to him now-a-days? I know he puts out music but we never hear anything about it. People told me that his last CD wasn't good. I should buy it though because my tastes are normally different from others. Actually I think my husband has it. I need new music to be acquainted with ASAP. Maybe that way I wouldn't be so dag on bored all of the time.

Music is a lifesaver... Thank you Jehovah for ears!

My Post From District Bride Guide

I'm pulling this post over from my weekly submission to District Bride Guide. The post will be up tomorrow, but I wanted to post it here today as I think it's worth sharing. Let me know what you think of the topic.

Do You Expect A Happy Marriage?

I've been on facebook all day it seems like! For the first time in who
knows how long, I visited the profiles of friends who I graduated from high
school with ten years ago and guess what?! A great number of us have gotten
married within the last two years! Isn't that crazy? Well, maybe not.
This IS about the time when many Americans get hitched... 25, 26, 27 years
old. I thought I was going to get married straight out of college, but I'm so
happy that I didn't... The timing of my marriage couldn't have been more
perfect.

I think I'm bitten by the love bug. I'm so happily married guys! I actually
can't believe how happy I am. I am being 100% honest when I say that
I didn't think it was possible to be this happy living beside another human
being with different preferences, experiences and thinking abilities than
I. Let me tell you why.

During our pre-marital counseling session, we were "warned" as it were.
Being that our sessions were spiritual in nature, we were given every scripture
in the book Bible regarding marriage, communication, selfishness, respect
and other necessary topics. Everyone that we came in contact with who was
already married told us that even though there will be good times, prepare
prepare and prepare some more for the hard times. I was once told
to pack my marriage tool kit, and to pack every single fix-it tool
that I could find. With counsel like that, I was a little nervous.
Actually, I was scared. With each session that we had, I wasn't sure if I
was to expect a happy marriage. Now, I'm not saying that the sessions weren't
helpful because they were. But they sure did give me a lot to think about -
which was probably the point. While I'm not in dire need of my marriage tool kit
at the moment, I'm glad I know where it is. So let me ask you this...

Do you expect a happy marriage? Or are you super aware of the hard
times ahead like I was? What kind of space do you see you and your mate in
around year marks one, five and ten? Will you still be getting
dressed up and going on dates in Georgetown? Will you still make love? Will you
still write love notes and slip them into each others coat
pockets? What do you expect your marriage to look like? I'd love to
hear.

As far as my marriage is concenered, I'm glad to say that things are
absolutely divine on this 76th day of my marriage. (I'm not keeping track. I
promise. I just looked it up on what is now our "old" wedding site.) My
expectations are superceded and I will work very hard to have this feeling a
year from now and even further into the future. I EXPECT a happy marriage.

Jones Magazine

If you haven't already subscribed, please do! Jones Magazine is awesome. The whole concept of the magazine speaks to me. Cultured, fashionable, informative, selective (for black women only), and elegant. It's very high quality and very thorough amidst the topics that concern most black fashionista women. If you're anything like me, you'll love it!

In the national premiere issue (the mag used to be Houston based only, so congrats to the mag's expansion!), there were two very interesting articles on power tools such as blow dryers, flat irons, etc. and another on au natural hair. I learned what heated hair tools are better than others and the seriousness of the misconception that just because you have natural hair means that you don't have to treat or maintain it as much as if you had relaxed chemically treated hair. Being an au natural beauty myself, I learned a lot from that article. If the ingredients on your hair care substances contain alcohol or menthol, chuck them. They'll dry your hair out in a second. The article explains that many women with natural hair suffer from under moisturized hair. This really hit me because every morning when I wake up, even after wearing my silk scarf, my hair is bristly dry. I hate it. So with the article's suggestion, I picked up a product from Target that my mom used that I absolutely love - Nourish & Shine by jane carter solution. It shines and moisturizes up the hair in an instant without any of the weightiness you would expect. Lol. I sound like a commercial don't I?

But anyway, back to Jones. Peep the episodes of the reality show they had on Centric here. It'll draw you into the magazine and the editor-in-chief's life in a second. Tracey Ferguson is fabulous. I only hope that they continue the show sooner than later. Tracey is a major personal inspiration. If she can follow a dream, so can I. Thanks Jones Magazine and Tracey Ferguson!

A Blessed Long Weekend

Hi everyone! Today is my first day back to work. I had a lovely long weekend. I went to the convention, got my encouragement on, and got re-energized for another year of spiritual service. My spiritual goals for the year are to read the Bible daily and to really study what I'm learning. I feel if I get a little something in me on daily basis, it'll be really hard to fall off track.

On Sunday after the convention, mom, dad, sis, husband and I drove a little futher into VA for a post-wedding reception that my mother-in-law threw for us. It was so nice! She called it a Meet and Greet. Since we had a small wedding, she wanted to throw a party where my family and I could meet the rest of Marcus' fam. It was really special. We ate, we danced, we took pics (see facebook!), and we got gifts! My mom-in-law even gave me money for a new dress, so with her help I looked dressed for success! Oh, and I have to say that my husband knows what looks good on me. From shoes to dresses, he always picks out the best stuff. Thanks hubby for the dress pick!

Yesterday, we were entirely too tired to go to work so we called out and had a special day on our own. We slept, we ate, we went shopping, we had our family worship which was on learning about Jehovah through his creation, we budgeted our money for the week, we visited his mom where we picked up our new Mac desktop for the house, and we went to the movies! It was great. In the movies, Marcus out of the blue said, "This is the kind of day I like. Spending every moment with my friend." That left the biggest smile on my face of course. All he could do was laugh at me because of how hard I was cheesing. Oh! How could I forget this!? We also got the GREATEST news yesterday. Marcus got the government job he applied for!!! Woohoo! We worked so hard on those KSAs and prayed so hard. =) Jehovah is really blessing us.

I am so full of blessings and love. I can't imagine marriage and life getting any better than what it is right now. I am so thankful. I know Jehovah is looking out for us as we continue to serve Him. Thank you Jehovah for a wonderful life!

Spritually Thinking

You know what I never thought about? Jesus was with His father for eons before coming to earth right. Jesus was even with His Father when He created earth and put perfect Adam and Eve on the earth. So He knew that men were supposed to be created in God's image and and how peaceful humans were to live. So imagine what Jesus must have thought when He came to earth and noticed how jacked up things had gotten? How far from His Father's original purpose the world had become? I can see Jesus just standing in the streets looking around taking in how serious and ugly the effects of sin were. Imagine Jesus looking over his left shoulder and seeing the Pharisees preaching in God's temple with big ole egos and wrong information and then looking at his left and noticing men having arguments with other men over cheating scales that caused them to have to pay more than what an item is worth. Man! Jesus' heart must have been heavier than a ton of bricks. If I were Jesus, I would have been so sad shaking my head thinking that they had no idea how life could have been.

Reflecting on Jesus' feelings gets me to thinking... I am so happy that Jesus didn't just wallow in our pitiable state and leave us like that. Instead, he was motivated to teach everyone about the good news. He literally ran around from city to city teaching everyone that Jehovah is the God who we should look to for better living, AND if you obey Him, you'll get back to the paradise that was intended for us! Being a Christian (a person who strives to imitate Christ), I appreciate Jesus' example. People today have no idea what life was supposed to be like. I told my co-worker that it would be nice to work alongside and relax with people in love with no effects of sin or death in the mix. We would all just be genuinley happy, playing with the tigers and swimming with the crocodiles. He said that he doesn't know if he wants to live in a world where it's just happy all the time. Well I do. After living in a world where I see people dying from cancer, little children getting raped by their fathers and families losing their houses with no choice but to move to shelters, I'm ready for some peace. I'm ready for the suffering to end and I'm determined to live my life right so that I can be there to see it. It's the hope and faith in a brighter future that gives me my endurance. No one or nothing is going to prevent me from being in that paradise that was originally intended for us. If God wants it for me, why should I not want it for myself?

Just Writing

I feel better than I did yesterday. While getting dressed this morning, I stopped and danced through a whole song. It was nice to get my blood running like that. People are irritating me at work. Well, not people. Just the other receptionist. She's not a very smart cookie I'm finding. I wish I could give her a portion of 'no disrespect' the next time she brings another one of her front desk issues to me. If a guest comes to the front desk with an issue, handle it. Don't call me and then bring them back to me. Just think for a second and figure it out. I can do no more than you can. Gosh, I can't stand slow people. I know that sounds bad, but it's true.

I'm ready to get my convention on. I'm so glad my sis is coming. Things are always interesting when she's around. I love my sister when she's easy to love. Ha! But this is my first year attending the convention as a married woman. This is the very event that I've been dreaming about having a husband for. When I was engaged the first time around, I kept picturing myself sitting alone at district conventions. I'm so glad that I will be sitting next to my partner in Christ.

My husband read my blog yesterday and subsequently pulled out my breakfast this morning. Te he he. And get this! I don't even want it today! I'm so over my yogurt and granola bar mix. I've had it for three days straight. I wish I had a toasted bagel with cream cheese. But I reached down in my stash of goodies and had some maple & brown sugar oatmeal instead. I wish there were more options for quick and fast breakfasts. I absolutely love waffles, pancakes and french toast along with a bomb omelette, but who has time for that in the morning unless you pay for it? I'm already looking forward to lunch. I have to go buy a few things for the convention during my lunch break but I'm hoping to spend a little time relishing in some noontime goodness. Gosh I'm so hungry right now. I think I'm going to go Chinese today. It's been a while since I've had some good Chinese. I'm tempted to order it now. Shooooo. Ok. We just ordered. 12 noon on the dot. I haven't ordered with an office group in a while. Gotta get my portion of the money straight cuz you know how it goes when you order food in a group. I wonder what my husband's going to eat tonight.

I really have nothing to do today. I should be looking into the ideas that I have, but I kinda need supplies to get things moving. I need to take a visit to Office Depot. I like going to that store. What else is there to talk about? Umm.... The rain stopped. We needed it. I hope it starts up again. I wouldn't mind if it drizzled like it's been doing all day long. Gotta keep the hair protected though because it's fresh. My hair finally looks good guys. Cut just the way I like it. That reminds me that I need to take some pictures. We were supposed to do a photo shoot last night but we got home too late after we picked the car up from the shop. Speaking of cars, we were talking about buying a new one hypothetically. We are certainly in no position for one, but with the chance of this new job that MJ applied for, we can't help but to dream. I still believe that even with him making six figures, we'll still be broke. I say mo' money, mo' problems, but mister man doesn't agree. We'll see. Maybe he knows something that I don't. When you can afford more, you do more. And boy oh boy am I looking forward to traveling through a timeshare.

That gets me off to another subject: kids. I wrote about this topic on my weekly blog spot over at bridedistrict just this past week. My heart is softening a little in regards to not having them. I want them, but then again I don't. Did you see that dude get beat up in the hallway at Bowie High? I can't even imagine what the hallways will look like when my child turns 14. I'm scared son. I told myself that this whole children thing has to be decided before I turn 30. I really want to be on a roll with this kiddie thing by then if we decide to have them. But who knows. Right now, I'm looking forward to traveling. In the short-term, I really want to hit up New York and California to get the theatre and see Jenn, respectively. In the long-term (but not so long-term), I want to do a cruise with hubby and eventually take that European trip with my mom and sis.

Well I'm going to watch a Judy Garland movie for the time being. Talk to you all soon and have a great weekend.

Psychobabble

How did you get this number?
I can't get my head 'round you
Of course you're not coming over
Snap out of it
You're not making any sense
You couldn't be more wrong darling
I never gave out these signs
You misunderstood no meaning
Snap out of it
I'm not falling for this one

If love is surrender
Than who's war is it anyway

Do just what I tell you
And no one will get hurt
Don't come in any closer
Cuz I don't know how long I can hold my heart in two

If you think that's is so damn easy
Then what do you need me for
Just look at the state of you man
Snap out of it
You're not listening to this

And just for once could you
Let me finish my sentence

Do just what I tell you
And no one will get hurt
Don't come in any closer
Cuz I don't know how long I can hold my heart in two
Make no sudden movements
And no one need get hurt
You're making me nervous
If you know what's good for me, why would I be loving you?

Now I've had it up to here
Don't ever try that again
Why are you so quiet so suddenly
Go on a bit
You're just dying to try me

Do just what I tell you
And no one will get hurt
Don't come in any closer
Cuz I don't know how long I can hold my heart in two
Make no sudden moments
And no one need get hurt
You're making me nervous
If you know what's good for me, why would I be loving you?

So what do we do now?
So what do we do now?

- Frou Frou

One of My Favorite Songs Ever - Let Go

Miley Cyrus Made Me Cry

Everyone should feel bad for me today. I started crying this morning to Miley Cyrus' "Party In The U.S.A.". Now you KNOW I'm trippin.

"So I put my hands up. They're playing my song. The butterflies go away. Nodding my head like yeah. Moving my hips like yeah. Got my hands up. They're playing my song. I know I'm going to be okay. Yeeaaaaah. It's a party in the USA."

I feel an absolute mess and had an emotional morning on top of it. My hair is not done. My nails are breaking. And I hate what I'm wearing. I struggle every single day when I go to my closet. I wish I could trash my whole wardrobe and start over. I looked in the mirror when I changed clothes again and automatically knew it was going to be a rough day. When I finally left the bedroom, I saw that my husband packed his breakfast and lunch. After I looking around the kitchen for my breakfast, I realized he didn't take care of me. I guess with the internal and emotional struggle I was feeling, I really didn't want to have to pack my own breakfast if he was already in there, but oh well. I threw a yogurt and granola in my purse and walked out the house. So after I struggled to reach over and close the passenger side door that my husband didn't shut tight enough, I veered off, got on the beltway, and Miley came on.

"Got my hands up. They're playing my song. I know I'm going to be okay. Yeeaaaaaah."

I started singing it real loud. I guess the notion that music is going to make everything okay really hit me. So there I was, screaming this song at the top of my lungs with tears welling in my eyes.

"The DJ plays my song and I feel alright!!!!"

Decorating: Patio Design

I've recently been envisioning what my theme for the patio will be. And what I've decided to do is to pick a posh, sophisticated outdoor rug that speaks to me and to build the accessorizing pieces around that such as lighting, wall art and a few pieces of furniture. I'm really hoping to find a vintage double seated couch via a thrift or consignment store that I can use, but we'll see how lucky I get. My friends over at overstock.com have been helping me select the rug of my choice. For some reason, my eyes keep glancing over towards area rugs with a black undertone. Here are my favorites so far. I think I already know which one I want, but let me know which one you like the best. Thanks!

Sunny

Resorts


Oasis


Bimini

Another Week In My Life

Yaaaawwwn. Another week to go.

How ya doin folks? Me? I'm just fine. Lovin life and life is lovin me. We're getting ready to attend our annual district convention in Richmond for three days of spiritual food. There's so much to do before we get there. Today I have to get our laundry down to a bearable size. I need to take MJ's shirts to the cleaners. And I have to start planning our meals for the three days. Sunday after the convention, we're staying down in VA for a 'Meet & Greet Mr. and Mrs. Jackson' event that my mother-in-law is throwing. I hear that a lot of people are coming. I'm excited to meet MJ's family. We're going to get home waaay late that night. Maybe I should take off Monday too. Let me email hubby to see if he thought about that. I'm expecting to get the new clothes that I bought off modcloth.com by Tuesday or Wednesday. Then I'll really be able to figure out what I'm going to wear. Tuesday I need to wash my hair and Wednesday, I need to get it trimmed up again and then make sure I'm all packed. Detra never cuts my hair short enough the first time. She thinks that I'm not going to be able to grab it if it's too short. She underestimates my skill. lol.

I got my new Essence magazine yesterday. I'm always excited about that. Maybe today I won't be so bored at work now. Oh! I have a new tv series that I'm watching too. Keeping up with the Joneses. It's a pretty inspiring show because it's everything that I'm interested in. The creator of the Texas regional fashion magazine "Jones", Tracey Ferguson, is chronicling her life while being a mother of two and while trying to expand the magazine to a national status. Tracey is so fabulous and together that I'm enthralled. I'm hoping to use the inspiration I get from the show to dabble into some things of my own. We'll see how far I get with it. Love it!

What else is up? Marcus got a phone call from a friend last night that he missed. We were so excited to call him back hoping that we were going to get invited out somewhere, but when we heard that the call was accidental, we were quite bummed. So pathetic we are... But that's okay. We had a great weekend together. Saturday amongst the misty rain of the morning, my husband told me to get in the car without knowing where he was taking me. To my smile's benefit, we ended up at the local pond that's looped by a woodside trail that I've mentioned I wanted to take a peak at. We pass by it everyday but we never knew what was beyond the first glance. It was so special because I always talk about playing in the rain and that's exactly what Marcus had us do. We ran hand in hand through the misty downpours throughout our excursion around the pond. What's best about it is that he didn't even complain! With white sneakers on and all, he never said a word. He just grabbed my hand and let me through the woods. Even when I told him that we couldn't do this because of his sneakers and the heavy rain drops, he said no and pulled me onwards. My husband is so good to me. Ever since I explained to him through tears about how I need someone who likes the same things I like, he's stepped his game up. The man truly takes care of my heart and I love him for that. He's so tender with me and works very hard to make me happy. I'm so blessed.

Okay, I'm all mushy inside so I'm going to go now. Lol.

Have a nice day everyone.

Gillian in Georgia

Did anyone know that Jill Marie Jones has a show on TBS called "Gillian in Georgia"? It's a cute little mini-series with 2 minute episodes. All of the episodes are on TBS.com. Check it out!

Click Here for Full Episodes

If Jenn Was Here..

...we'd be going to see J*Davey tonight at Liv. $18 cover or not, Jenn woulda made me go and I would have a fantastic time. I haven't seen J*Davey in forever. I wish I had a personal bodyguard. I'd feel so much better about doing things alone.

If Jenn was here, we would connect over our Christian integrity struggles.

If Jenn was here, I wouldn't have to be concerned with my conduct 24/7 so as to not stumble her when I'm out an about.

If Jenn was here, I could release.

If Jenn was here, I could be the fun me.

If Jenn was here, we would be up in Bohemian Caverns every Wednesday making friends and groupie stalking the latest artistic gem at the open mic/poetry jam.

If Jenn was here, we'd be winding it up with our rasta men at the Eighteenth Street Lounge Rocker's International Night! Gosh I miss our sweatin'-the-hair-out dance sessions!!!!

If Jenn Was Here...

Two Months Down

Today is our two month anniversary. It's kinda laughable to bring it up, but I can't help but to notice. So how has it been so far? Umm... Let me see. One thing is for sure. We've had more happy moments than sad. We've had two major fights so far and they were pretty huge ones. It's funny how we often remember the bad times more than the good times. That sucks quite frankly. What I do remember though is our day together this past Monday. Simply beautiful. The highlight of it for me was the time we spent on the couch together. We read the Bible together, prepared for the Bible study and talked about our relationship and the experiences we've shared together. It's not often that we sit down and have a focused conversation about something sweet. I can now see how easy it is for married ones to have exchanges about bills, food, and to dos and forget about expressing our feelings for one another. The conversations that two people who are dating have are different than the conversations that married people have. But that shouldn't be the case. I hope to infuse more of that dating spirit into my marriage. Overall though, things are good. We have little problems compared to the things I've heard. Those little attitudes that each of us get are nothing in the grand scheme of things. I really do feel like I married the best man for me. There's no one in this world that's as j.a.c. as MJ. The love in my heart for him will never go away. I look at him often and am so pleased with my decision. When I look at him, there's no fear, no worry, no unsettling feeling. When I look at him, everything is all good. I am so thankful for that feeling. So with two months down, I look forward to the many more months to come. Happy Anniversary to me.

Update: Michyle asked, so I provide ---> Wedding Pics

Donna Summer's Daughter

Introducing Amanda Sudano-Ramirez. She's oh so fabulous.

Modeling


Singing as a duo with her husband in their band Johnnyswim

How I'm Feeling

I wish I had access to a dance studio. I would like to vent through this song. I would like to escape.