90's Music: Remember When??

Fall Trends 2010

I'm itching to shop. I'm so excited for this year's fall trends. Here are seven. Which trend are you looking to buy this season?

The Aviatrix



I have my pea coat so it's time to search for a good quality aviator jacket.

Camel Classics



I have a cute camel overcoat with a leopard fur collar to boot that I'm excited to wear this year.

The Great Cover Up



Zara is great for these capes and cover up coats. There's where I got mine!

Country Cool



Anybody up for cable knit sweaters and parkas?

Amazing Lace



I'm looking for minimal lace this year... Just a shirt will do, if I find the right one.

Scarlet Fever



Now, this is what I'm talking about. I definitely need to go scarlet shopping. I love the color red. If I'm pinching pennies, red lipstick and my red, wedding pumps will have to do.

Tailor Made



Borrow from the boys. Blazers and tailored pants suits. This is my biggest want. Pants and pants suits.

Shopping List: winter white & grey cigarette pants, aviator jacket, lace shirt, tailored suit, red dress, parka, cable knit sweater, feminine frilly blouses

How I'm Feeling: Tired But Calm

I love the feel of this song... It goes perfectly with my mood. "I love you much too much." Thank you Maze.

Interesting Topics

I recently started reading Clutch Magazine and I'm glad I found the site. I've been in need of some pointed discussions and that's exactly what Clutch gives me.

Check out these two articles and tell me what you think.

The Super Ex-Boyfriend - The author challenges our ideas on cutting ties with exes. I wholeheartedly disagree with the article, however, I'm interested in the topic. While some may be able to stay friends with their exes out of sheer concern, I'm not to sure how I would feel about my husband checking up on his exes every now and then. Actually, I am sure how I would feel. I can imagine the issues and arguments that would result from the periodic check-ins. "Why don't you take the time to ask me how my day is in the same way you ask her how her life is going?" When we're living together, we often take each other for granted forgetting to do or say the simplest things such as "How was your day?" or "I miss you." It's not that we intentionally forget. It's just that when you see someone day after day, you tend not to be so formal. No matter if it's once or twice a year, I certainly don't want to hear my husband feeling concerned about his exes life for fear that I might get... jealous. Yep jealous.

Are You The Thorn Or Rose In A Black Man's Ass? - The comments are hilarious on this one. I agree that sometimes women need to contemplate their words and the magnitude of the support they give their black men. We can be very strong and hard with our men. Why not season your suggestions and advice with salt? Many of the commenters seem to feel that this article is an attack on the black women. I don't feel that way at all. The article isn't meant to address how wonderful we are. That's a separate post altogether and we all know there are a dozen of those out there. Our men are just asking us to be easy sometimes. What's wrong with that?

My Weekend

Yaaawn...

My weekend was good. It's the first one in a while that was joyful, i.e. void of crazy j.j. attitude. I think I need to give that chick a name because she certainly has a personality and identity of her own. I think I'm going to call her Jex. It seems appropriate that she have the letter 'x' in her name because baby girl can be criss crossed and out of her mind. Word to the wise...no one can identify her but me though. None of that, 'Jex must be here' stuff from other people. That'll only make her turn into Jexazel, and you really don't want to meet her. Lol. But back to the weeknd.

It was really cool man. Friday, I went to my mother in laws for a ladies movie night. We watched Look Who's Coming To Dinner with Harry Belafonte and Katherine Hepburn. I love that movie. Didn't realize how funny it was until I watched it with the ladies. The best part of the night was after the movie when everyone began talking about how they knew their husbands were the one and what mistakes they made in their prior marriages. (The age range was somewhere around 35 - 50.) I didn't say much, but took good mental notes. I like listening to the married wisdom of older women.

Saturday after a good morning of door to door preaching work and a Bible study, my husband and I cooled out in the house with each other and a movie. The movie was actually pretty interesting/suprising so we got a good post-conversation in about the purpose of life. It was made clear that we have differing approaches to life. At times, I've felt that it's THE thing that divides us, but I'm beginning to wrap my mind around appreciating our differences. It's hard to find the wonder in our differences, but I'm working on it. I think that's my major lesson right now.

After the movie, my husband checked his account and got stupid excited at the amount of money that was there. You see, it was his first paycheck from his new position and he undercalculated how much he would get. It was funny seeing him get so hype. It was cute actually. It's nice to see him worry free. The next words out of his mouth were "Get dressed baby! We're going out!" Two hours later we were sitting in Ruth's Chris talking, laughing, discussing... We invited a young couple who we hadn't yet hung out with to dinner so once they arrived, we had quite the nice couples conversation about alcohol, food and the first year of marriage. We were too siditty while sipping our wine and eating our chocolate cake with sweet cream and berries. Lol. After dinner, the four of us went down to K street and cut it up over long island ice teas. I haven't had that much fun in a while.

Yesterday, we rose after about two hours of sleep to join my parents, my sis and her boyfriend on a trip to Ocean City. We only got in a few hours on the beach though because it began to storm. But we made some nice memories, sitting on the beach talking about anger management and sitting in the car sheltered from the rain by a car wash while eating fried chicken and potato salad.

Needless to say, I'm tired. MJ and I have family worship tonight, but after that, I'm washing my hair and then passing out.

How was your weekend?

Scriptures And Thoughts For Controlling Anger

I apparently have an issue with anger when I'm PMS-ing. So, what could be more on time than a Biblical study entitled "Gracious Speech Promotes Good Relations"? Don't really mind me here. I just feel the need to re-type or jot down ideas and scriptures that stick out to me while reading. Take what you want from it.

- "'Let your utterance be always with graciousness, seasoned with salt.' (Col. 4:6) Such tasteful, appropriate speech is essential to good communication and peace."

- "Good communication does not mean saying everything you are thinking and feeling at any given moment, especially if you are upset. The Scriptures show that uncontrolled expression of anger is a mark of weakness, no strenthg." Ha! Point well taken. That one hit me right in the face. Sometimes I rationalize my not so good speech by thinking that at least I'm communicating. No go jj. Work on that.

- All his spirit is what a stupid one lets out, but he that is wise keeps it calm to the last. - Prov. 29:11

- "'In the abundance of words there does not fail to be transgression, but the one keeping his lips in check is acting discreetly.' (Prov. 10:19) Yet, discretion does not mean never expressing oneself. It means speaking "with graciousness," using the tongue to heal rather than to hurt."

- "There exists the one speaking thoughtlessly as with the stabs of a sword, but the tongue of the wise ones is a healing." - Prov. 12:18

-"Death and life are in the power of the tongue, and he that is loving it will eat its fruitage." - Prov. 18:21 So basically, if I spit fire, I'm putting myself in line for death and not for everlasting life. Well I surely don't want to die when I have the option to live in a paradise forever. I need to check my tongue.

- "If something a brother has said or done disturbs you so much that you cannot simply pass over it, do not let hateful feelings fester in your heart. If someone angers you, get your own emotions under control and then take the steps needed to resolve the matter...address it kindly at an opportune time."

-"Speak...in a spirit of reconciliation." Word. Take steps to resolve. Don't seek ways to get back. When I'm hurt, I find that I reach out to hurt back. It's the natural reaction due to sin and imperfection. So I need to work the spirit of reconciliation.

-Take care to select the proper time to speak. Eccl. 3:1, 7 says, "the heart of the righteous one meditates so as to answer." This is what I need. I need to take time to figure out HOW to become gracious. Because when I'm mad, I don't even know how to be nice. Meditating first is going to prove beneficial. Taking my pen and paper and writing is out is always my remedy.

- "A discreet wife," one in whom her husband can really "put trust," is considerate of his feelings, just as she wants him to be of hers. "The truly wise woman has built up her house, but the foolish one tears it down with her own hands." - Prov. 14:1 That's powerful right there. The last time my husband and I got into it, I was so man that I tore him down. This scripture points out though that it's quite stupid to do that if you want a happy, upbuidling household. A woman's attitude can rule the whole house. If it's a bad one, it'll certainly bring everyone down. So my lesson is to not tear down. Basically, if I don't have anything nice to say, don't say it at all. Silence is golden.

- "Handling anger calmly is not simply a matter of putting on a serene face. Pray for Jehovah's help to rid your heart of hurtful feelings. Let Jehovah's spirit transform your mind and heart to conform to His will." Isn't the answer always to pray?

- "Practical steps...leave the scene, thus giving your emotions time to settle...make an extra effort to speak graciously. A cutting or agressive remark would add fuel to the fire even if it is delivered in a gentle voice. Pray for Jehovah's spirit to help you to say good things, not bad."

- Ecclesiates makes some good points...The end is always better than the beginning so be patient and don't be in a hurry to get offended, for the taking of offense is what rests in the bosom of the stupid ones. It also encourages us to not give your heart to everything that people say because you well know that you have said some things about people too. So instead of taking offense, patiently analyze why they may have said what they said. It'll help in moving us to be forgiving.

- "In order for us to receive God's forgiveness, we MUST forgive others. Be quick to apologize and quick to forgive."

Endearing

I just had to steal these pics from ybf today. They really struck my heart strings today. Married now, I understand the amount of hard work that can sometimes weigh a marriage down. There's simply nothing easy about it. And for that very reason, I really love these pics of Bey and Jay. Even though marriage is hard, this husband and wife team appears to be so.... what's the word? Easy! There's something so sweet and endearing about them. They actually look like friends...



Jay always throws his arm around Bey. Haven't you noticed that? Take a look back at some of the pics. He does it at the basketball games, walking down the street and on their yacht vacations too. It's such a "this is my homegirl, my roll dog" statement. It's different than holding hands, and even different than what Bey's doing in the second picture (which says "this is my baby who I love to take care of"). Jay's display of love is so casual...like an everyday thing. A simple, every day thing. I absolutely LOVE that. It's normal. It's effortless.



These pics are inspiring to me. Of course, we're only seeing one side of the story, but what we do see is immensely loving. They're having fun, they're smiling, they're into one another... It's almost as if the novelty of being together hasn't worn off. And how long have these two been together? Since 2002! Dating for 6 years and married for 2. There's no question that these two are grounded in each other. It shows.




One of my biggest fears in my marriage is that the novelty of each other will wear off and we'll get tired of one another. Or that the idea of each other is no big deal anymore. I'm telling you, the conflicts and arguments can do something terrible to the bond of a couple. Especially a couple that hasn't been together that long like my husband and myself. It's almost like each argument can start to degrade the relationship. Soon enough you're just focusing on ways to avoid disagreements instead of ways to bond and live easy. You can tell that Bey and Jay are friends. What their fights are like, no one will know. But one thing is for sure. After being together for 8 years, we can be sure they've had their share. So to come out looking like this is so awesome. I only pray that I look this way in 8 years. I want something natural, easy and happy too.

Keri's Breaking Point

Can't wait for this girl to hit the airwaves again. Here's why...


Keri Hilson -Breaking Point(clean) - No Boys Allowed by The Chamber Group

Isn't this hot?

The new album "No Boys Allowed" is slated to drop in late 2010. Loving that title. Get it Keri.

Yes, Jones Magazine! Yes!

Jones Magazine, the premier magazine resource for multicultural women like me, has taken my heart. They have created not one but TWO fierce covers for the most talked about issue of the year for fashion magazines. Everyone who knows publishing, knows that September is the issue of the year for every print magazine. Vogue, Bazaar, Cosmopolitan! You ain't nothing on Jones Magazine! I'm so proud of Jones for pulling in with the ranks of the best on their second national issue! Take that!

Take a preview of 17 full pages of the magazine which is on stands now! Subscribe or buy yours today!

http://www.pdf-archive.com/2010/08/17/wav4jzq/jonesfallfashionissuepdf.pdf

Facebook Blocked

Can you believe it? All of a sudden, I'm getting super sensitive about sharing my business! Yesterday, I temporarily deactivated my facebook account (yes, only temporarily) and for the past couple weeks, Ive found myself journaling a lot more rather than blogging. I don't know what the deal is, but I'm becoming so private! Anyone who knows my blogging history can understand how big of a shift this is for me. I used to share my entire world with the internet. What the latest embarrasing emotional pain I was in, what new booty scratching ailment I had (not really) and what color underwear I had on.

Is the purpose of facebook really to keep in touch with your friends and family, or is it more so to be nosey and snoop around in the lives of others? I can tell you for a fact that I snoop. And not only do I snoop, but I form opinions of people based on their pictures and start to catch feelings about people's status messages when they're a little too perky or a little to immature. For example, upon hearing about this new chick that I was supposed to catch a happy hour with, I immediately found her on facebook to gather investigative information. What kind of clothes does she wear? Does she keep her hair neat? Who are her friends? Is she miss chatty on this thing? When was her latest wall post? Don't fake like you don't do it too. I have facebook lojack on you. I always know where you are.

What did we do before facebook and twitter? I can't even remember. Pagers. That's what we did. I never had a pager though, so you know what I did?! I wrote letters! Gasp! Remember when we used to write notes and fold them up like footballs? (My husband wrote me a note like that recently and it brought back so many warm feelings.) Remember when we couldn't wait to open it and read it so you could write one back and shyly pass it back? Having to walk up to someone to pass them the note was real man! You actually had to muster up guts and feel some raw emotions and crap! It was real. We don't do that anymore.

So why did I deactivate my account? Honestly, because of how stupid emotionally attached I was to that thing. I felt like I had no control! It's really silly, but there are some people on there that I'm not really feeling too much, but for some reason, I'm always clicking on their name to find out what they did or said lately. How stupidly curious! And then I would do the "ugh" sound everytime I ended up on their profile only to click away in disgust. (That is so unchristian of me to portray such disdain. Forgive me Lord.) But why do I do that to myself?!

You know what it is too? I have a real hatred towards cliques. Facebook is nothing but an universal manifestation of cliques. It brings out of me a longing to want to be "in". It makes me forget that I am in fact the ish all by myself, even without a facebook account. Yes, that's the real reason I left facebook.

But for all the things that facebook isn't, there are a million reasons that facebook is. And that's why, one day, I'll be back.

How I'm Feeling

Just for today, I wish I was alone in the world. I need peace.

Get It Together

Happy Monday everyone. I hope you all had a good weekend. Mine was so so. My cold is getting better but it's still running me ragged. I'm so drained. It's not even sleep that I need. I'm just generally exhausted. Tired of being sick I guess.

I'm hot as I don't know what. I don't know if it's because of this long sleeved shirt whose sleeves I rolled up or the oatmeal I'm eating. Normally I'm cold in this office. I was hot before I left for work though as I was going around the house trying to clean up. The condo looks like a disaster. I need an entire day to clean. When I get home, I'm just so out of it. Sitting around all day with nothing to do gets tiring. I should start exercising. I've been asking hubby to show me what he does in the gym so that I can concoct an exercise regiment of my own, but I can do it without him. He says he's too tired for the gym but that has nothing to do with me.

I need to step it up. I need to work a little harder around the house, get into the gym, apply to jobs... I just need to get it together.

I'm going to start on my personal Bible study now so I'll check ya'll later. I hope you have a great and productive week.

Goodness

I have three celebrity loves. Idris Elba, Michael Ealy and Lance Gross. Idris is definitely on the top of the list.

My Weekend Is Ruined!

Goodness... I Truly Hope The Rumors Are True

Lauryn Hill is the business. I would LOVE to see her in concert in the near future. I never thought this day would come again.

Bilal New Album "Airtight's Revenge" September 14th

I'm excited for Bilal's new Album. Make sure you get it on September 14th! "Airtight's Revenge"

How Was Your Weekend?

Good morning everyone. Happy Monday. How was your weekend? Well I hope. I hope you did something fun. The days and weeks seem to run together at times, so it's nice to be able to enjoy the time off and soak in as much peace and relaxation as you can. Recharge your batteries, so to speak.

My weekend was... (I always have a hard time remembering exactly what I did.) Let me think. It was... eventful. Friday, my husband and I went to the movies to see Salt right after I picked him up from the metro station. I ended up being in a funky mood for whatever reason, so I went to bed early that night. Saturday morning, my husband and I got into an argument (probably because of said funky mood that didn't seem to go away) and then promptly made up. We then went to my parent's so that I could meet with a client. I have a photography job that I want to do extremely well on, so I actually need to take some time today and think about how I want to approach the job creatively. After meeting with the client, mom, dad, my husband and I went out to Fairfax, VA to schmooze with some old friends of the family. The Mrs. of the house just got promoted to VP of HR so we went to celebrate with them and to kind of step my toe back into her world for potential networking opportunities. I left promising to get on her calendar so I need to make sure I do that. Saturday night, my husband took me back to the spot where we used to sit in the car together while dating. It was nice to go back and visit the old dating grounds. Sunday, after service, we went to Carrabas for a nice dinner and then came home to rest, watch tv and cook together. I think my favorite day of the weekend was Sunday, although I was sad that Sunday evening meant work in the morning. I like time alone with my husband.

This week is going to be different. I'm not going to sit at this desk bored out of my mind. I'm going to conjure up a plan. Today, after finishing my Bible reading and studies, I am going to do a couple of things. I'm going to set up the next steps for my business and plan out when I'll be able to register for photography and design classes according to my paychecks. Then I'm going to sketch out a creative design scheme for the side job I acquired Saturday. I also plan to re-do my budget, look for jobs and crack open a new novel that I brought from home. I know that I hate my job, but I want to make the best of this. I can't have the time that I spent here go in vain.

Anyway, how was your weekend and what big plans do you have for the week? How will you make the best out of your week? I could use the inspiration so let me know! =) Have a good one.