Thursday, December 18, 2008

It's Hard

This post and it's subsequent comments really upset my little sister today. Being raised the way we were, my sister and I are pretty much "good girls". But from the post/comments, it's pretty much clear that dudes aren't checking for the "good girls". Well, let's not say that. Let's say that dudes aren't checking for "good girls" who are virgins. To be a good girl is okay because mature men are looking to wife up the good girls. But a good girl with no experience in the bedroom is just too much.

I've been through experiences where I've had crushes on guys and they've avoided me because they didn't want to corrupt me. While it sucks at first, it becomes a blessing. It's a great thing when your character speaks for itself and helps to avoid compromising situations. I'm thankful for those crushes who had enough respect for me.

Within the last couple of days, there have been ideas and thoughts tossed around that 'Grade A' men do not exist. And from what I read in that blogpost, I can see why my sis and friends believe so. I'm trying hard not to fall into that line of thought but shoooo... It's downright near impossible! The world and the people in it are a mess. JennWill said to me, "I guess for me I'd rather believe what I want doesn't exist and be surprised when he shows up rather then to believe he does and be waiting anticipating his arrival. That would make me impatient, which would be all bad... " I hear her. I really do. This approach does seem like the better way to go, and I'm thinking about adopting it, however.... I'm a dreamer. I see the world through rainbows. Adopting this mentality just would not be natural for me. Don't get it twisted though. I CAN do it. I can force myself to do anything. It's just a matter of whether or not I want to. What I'm worried about though, is becoming blind. If I do this, will I be able to notice a 'Grade A' man if he hit me upside my head? I'm not trying to have this man look at me and think to himself, "well dag. what happened to her?!" (cue song... Baag Laadyyyy. you gone miss your bus, draggin all them baaags like thaaaaat.)

I'm even more so concerned because my 'Grade A' man is SO rare. A man who's "in the Word" as my friend said yesterday. But he can't only be "in the Word", he has to live his life like it too. Now THAT, my friends, is hard and EXTREMELY rare. I don't know ya'll. I just don't know.

Here's how the convo with my sis ended.

me: yeah. that's another reason i'm so into my spirituality right now. of course i want to serve God just out of principle sake, but i can't meet anyone until i'm right. so i'm in this spirituality thing 100%. I have to be honest, it IS one of my motivating factors. it helps me to keep on the right road

sis: well, i hope you find what you trudging for on the other side then. God, I hope you find it, with all my heart

me: i can't even respond to that. it just hits a tear duct cuz i want it so bad

sis: its all i can say. I know

me: i hope you find it too Pooh.

sis: me too. GOSH

me: doing it the right way can't be bad it just can't. what's the point then? what are we doing then? but God promised us. He promised ME and i'm holding Him to it. i seriously sometimes want to shake God and say, "lookie here man."

sis: lol at your last line. I finally feel what you feel and i'm sitting here with tears in my eyes at work

me: yeah man it's hard def. hard.

sis: alright. Shake it off. and get back to work. I'll ttyl Jen.

me: ok

sis: I can't wait to see you on Sunday

me: ditto. holla girl.


But maybe it's just me... said...

Wow. I just sat here and read the whole post and comments on 'Mystical Creatures'. Wow. So much things to say right much things to say. I've been wanting to write about this for some time now and now feel even more motivated to explore it. Continue to encourage your sister (and yourself). Doing something that is contrary to the prevailing actions of our society can be quite a task. But we also have to remember that our society is moving further and further down sketchy pathways. And if we stay in step with society, we'll be going the same way. I think one has to be clear about their reason(s) for waiting...because knowing that will make the decisions easier. But I digress...sorry for the mini-book...I should get back to work. :)

MysTery said...

Keep dreaming hun and just ask yourself what type of mentality does God want you to have. That is the answer everytime right there.
Cause you SURELY do not want to miss him when he comes along!

Be blessed and check my latest blog post! peaces!

MJ said...

Take your post, change the word guys to girls and you have the story of my life!

Malachi 3:10 "Bring all the tenth parts into the storehouse, that there may come to be food in my house; and test me out, please, in this respect,” Jehovah of armies has said, “whether I shall not open to YOU people the floodgates of the heavens and actually empty out upon YOU a blessing until there is no more want.”

Anonymous said...

LOL feel you MJ!!!!

I would love to get a review of what's on this list of yours. Your sis and I got into this Grade A conversation the other night. What she was telling me was a little cause for concern. There are some things that we want that really just don't matter.

I know I'm more open minded than most when it comes to the material things, but it just really sounds like, at least with talking to her, that she wants a godly man with worldly priorities. "He has to have a watch." Really?

Now, of course this is me talking, and I'm sure that hurts the validity of what I'm saying in the eyes of some, but please apply your grain of salt and still take it in. :-)

All I know is I agree with you on the being ready thing. I've learned to really wait on the Almighty. He knows what's best and always will, and He doesn't give us anything we're not ready for unless we rush things. That said, I've resolved to hold off on all things more than friends until I've got my stuff on lock spiritually, financially, and emotionally. So I definitely feel you.

I trust that He'll provide when I'm ready. Same with you. For now, you've got the right idea. Focus on your relationship with Him and being content where you are and He'll provide.


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