It's 3:14am. I just got back from a night of dancing with the ladies, and I realized something. I can't put it on them like I used to! It's funny because when I was back in high school sweating it up in the BYB and RE go-go's, I used to be the queen of such activity. I wasn't necessarily on the floor or up in the air, but I could definitely work any dude while standing on my own two feet. I was actually known for calling men out and proving that they couldn't hang. I even did a contest denoting such. (I'm glad no one remembers that one! Thank goodness for age and maturity.) But lately, I just can't bring myself to wind on a guy that I don't know, or any guy for that matter. Something about it turns me off. Tonight, all I kept doing was the playful push-away that inevitably forces these sweaty strangers to keep 1 yard of distance between my body and his. One guy even yelled above the music, "Am I giving you enough space?!" I guess my attempts were pretty obvious. But yeah man. I need my space. I can't have these random guys breathing all down my neck and laying their hairy, sweaty chests on my jazzy top. It's just not cute for me anymore.
And what's up with this one hand lightly touching my waist thing? Your fingertips are barely making contact with me, so I'm sure it's more of a nuisance to hold your arm there than it is to drop it. Why do guys do that? So that other dudes know that she's dancing with you? I don't get it. But whatever it is, it's wack. If you're going to touch me, be a man and grab me!, so that I can then politely ask you to let go. =)
No more grindin on random individuals for me. It does nothing for me. Sorry fellas!
17 comments:
Totally can relate...its all about growing up...my thing is this easy "step step, side to side..." that's right I will two step with you but noting more...heck I have more fun grooving alone! I am glad you are at that point...get your grown woman on Miss Lady!
:-D Again!
t.c. and Kep - thanks peeps. getting my grown woman on!
mikesee - hey now. lol. whatcha want me to say? i should make a song out of that line. stay tuned...
Please tell me you don't still dance with your back to a guy. I know girls who will start dancing when a guy walks up behind them but if he gets to close up on them they get mad. Doesn't make much sense to me but it happens.
LOL at Mike with the BHill quote. Same thing I was thinking at first...LOL
Nah Dane. No more booty rubbin for me. I can't really remember the last time I freaked it like that. Like t.c. said, I too prefer to dance alone. Besides, if one of my jams comes on I hardly have the consideration to pay attention to some dude. At that point, it's just me and the song. What makes me mad is when a dude can obviously see that I'm doing my own thing, and he wants to come up and insert himself into my groove. Boy please. Go 'head with that nonsense.
This is BHILL! And yall know me well because before I got down to the comment section I said to myself "DATSDATBULLSHYT SON!". Luckily I aint that grimey kat who whould follow that up with a "#UCKYOUCOMEHEREFOR?!?!"
Oh no guys! What's all this? Should i take it back? Don't mean to offend. Just can't pretend. ;-)
wow this got real deep real quick....why should we have to stay at home just because we don't want someone bumping and grinding all up on us? If I turn to you and shake my head and say AND motion, no thanks and keep dancing, what's so wrong with that? I don't know I just don't get it...I don't like dancing with folks because "some" people take things just too far...for example that fool from my birthday when we all went out...he was grabing and groping and just straight violating a sistah...WTH is that all about? That's why most of us just chose to dance alone I can't stand that mess...I mean I'll two step with you face to face and party with you all night long...but all that bodies touching and stuff and me feeling you "manhood" through your jeans...No thank you and I can't understand why "DATSDATBULLSHYT SON!"...I mean that's just a female point of view...it may be hard for a dude to understand...and I don't think its fair that I have to stay HOME and jam and dance and party just because I don't want to bump and grind to me that right there is "DATSDATBULLSHYT SON!"...I mean really fellas how would you feel is everything you danced someone grabbed your butt or your "manhood" and was gropping you out...its really not the greatest feeling in the world...
Dag on real this got deep real quick. I'm with you t.c. I hear you fellas, BUT, I don't wanna stay home and dance to the radio!!! I wanna go to the parties where people just wanna dance. Not hook up, but just dance. I guess those don't exist huh?
All I was tryna say was:
If you want to rock me/Come here and tell me/So I can say that it's a no go
If you wanna say it to me/Develop the courage to enlighten me/So I can decide to say no
If you're going to touch me /Be a man and grab me/So I can politely ask you to let go
But you gotta come correct/If you want some respect/Even if you get hit with the blow
Because there's nothing worse/Than a man with a blank verse/It's a little more than obscene
It's an unfortunate curse/Boy stop acting like a nurse/Be a man and grow a spleen
Stop clutchin that damn purse/Before I recommend you disperse/Standing there like you fourteen
So what if in the very end/I sort kinda recommend/That you be gone! and vanish off the scene
=P
I'm just joking fellas. Don't be mad. =)
BHILL (AGAIN). Aiight....I would never say that you should stay home. AND I DO go to the club to dance... That's just me. I don't go to holla or grab or nothing like that, but I don't want to dance by myself. Look at it like this. If the purpose of you going to the club is to dance by yourself, or just dance with your girlfriends...please take that as close to the wall as possible, and make room for the people who came to party and socialize. Honestly, I have used the soft touch on the hip many times just to establish the fact that I'm not trying to be disrespectful towards you. As the songs mix on and we start getting closer, that soft touch tends to change into the full grab, the full grab often turns into the face to face, and the face to face always turns into the spin and dip. Now fellas (tell me if I'm wrong)... some ladies, you can vibe with early and get right to the full grab, and some need a lil warming up (but this is just my theory based off of years of partyin). But anyway... the main point I'm trying to make is (like I said earlier)...if you dont want a guy to come up on you, or dance with you....take it to the wall. Aint nothin like steppin in the name of love by yo D@mn self!
@BHill - I'm glad you clarified cuz I thought the request for us to just stay home was a little harsh. lol.
"As the songs mix on and we start getting closer, that soft touch tends to change into the full grab, the full grab often turns into the face to face, and the face to face always turns into the spin and dip." The Spin and Dip huh? Like that?! Hilarious!!
Can't stand that light touch though. In T.C.'s words, "That's just me."
I think I can compromise. The outskirts near the wall is where I will be. =)
Bhill I love it! But I am still a "in the middle of the floor" type of girl...BUT it is often off to the side and not in the MIDDLE OF THE DANCE FLOOR...we just stand around each other and party...I appreciate your analysis and approach to the ladies...that's whats up...just don't take offense sometimes we just want to, like you said, step in the name of love by our D@mn selves...LOL
Not to say you should stay home, but what is it about the club that you can't get at home partying with your girls? I mean you'd get to pick the playlist, wouldn't have to worry about the dudes, you'd only really be interacting with your girls anyway. . . What is it about the club that makes you want to go? Is it that wanting attention thing you mentioned a while back?
I think dancing is one of those things that has an almost entirely different meaning to guys than it does to the ladies, especially in that setting.
Peace,
Kep.
kep - sometimes it's just about rush of getting ready. picking out that outfit, doing your hair, putting on that lip gloss and the heels. meeting up with the girls and turning the radio up on blast as you make your way. those things are fun for us. the energy and the ambience of the club makes a difference too. some people like to get out and grab a drink at the bar. attention is definitely a part of it. a lot of women don't feel fabulous until a man tells them so. and i can appreciate a big dance floor with the tiny apartment that i stay in! just a few...
Makes sense. Parties just never did it for me. Even for the classier ones that I didn't have a moral problem with, I've never been able to get what the big kick out of it is. Maybe it's because I'm partly a loner and like things more intimate. Not to mention I get bored with dancing reeeal quick unless people are doing something really impressive. Eh, different strokes! :-)
Peace,
Kep.
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