Friday, December 28, 2007

Ran-Dumb Thoughts

I'm scratching my head trying to figure out why I'm sitting at work. I just walked around the office and the entire opposite side is abandoned. There is honestly not a person in site. On my side, there are 5 of us here. Next year, when I have vacation, I'll know what to do. This is just sitting here with nothing to do. At least we have a half a day.

I hate to be a cliche but I hate Madden (unless I'm playing it). You can be having the nicest or the deepest conversation with a man when he cuts you off and says that he's about to play a game of Madden. I swear that Madden steals the souls of men and reverts them to children. Madden is evil.

I got a new camera and took pictures of the office today. I felt like a spy because no one's here.

I'm still not sure what to do with my hair. My aunt asked me what I was going to do with the front of my hair and I seriously have no clue. She said it's fine for after the captain's dinner but what am I going to do when I'm dressed up. Ha! She made me laugh with that one. But for real though, I need to figure something out.

Have a safe NYE people.

Thursday, December 27, 2007

Hair Dilemma Number 52

I've been thinking very hard...very very hard about what to do about my hair. It's plagued my mind for a while now as the cruise gets closer and closer. With 15 days to go, I figured I'd better figure out something kick. I told my cousin last night that I don't mind looking like a wild child in front of my friends, but when it comes to pictures... yeah. Don't take any. But we all know how impossible that's going to be, so after pondering wigs, weaves and braids, I decided to do something bold last night and wet my hair while in the shower. I had no idea what I was going to do with it or what it was going to look like when I got out, but I didn't really care. I have a hair appointment on Saturday, so I figured I could go a few days looking like a fool if I had to. I hadn't seen my hair wet in a while...especially since my hair isn't let loose long enough to look in a mirror while in the beauty shop. Lol. Ha! I'm laughing because it's amazing how everyone bum rushes you with some sort of tool whether it be a towel, a blow dryer, a comb, or rollers, as soon as you come out of the wash bowl. Do you realize that if our hair is left wet and unattended to longer than 5 seconds at the hairdresser, sirens go off?! You better believe that some one's always coming to straighten it out. Thank you Madame C. J. Walker! But anyway... I digress. So I get out the shower, go on about my business lotioning up and remembering to avoid the mirror. I figured it would be good practice because while on the beach and in the pool, I'm not going to have the ability to run to a mirror every 5 seconds, so why not play out the role now. So I managed to leave the bathroom without looking in the mirror. I came back 15 minutes later and oh my goodness!!! I'm not as dry and wild as I thought I would be! The back of my hair is curly! It's actually curly! I completely forgot that my new haircut would lend to a close curly do. I ran into my cousin's room and said "Look!" She was like "Wow! The back of your hair look really pretty!" Ladies and gentleman. I can not believe it. My hair looks good wet! HA! Now notice that I can only speak for the back. My front pieces have always been the bane of my existence. For some reason, the front of my head REFUSES to curl. But I'm not worried because I have all the gels, leave-in conditioners and curling appliances in the world. I'm going to figure out the front of my do. Even if I just decide to throw a headband on everyday. I'd rather do that than pay $500 for a weave or $200 for braids. I don't do braids anymore and I surely don't want to pay for a weave that I'm going to take out since I don't really like extra mess in my hair. So I have another 2 days to master this style before my appointment on Saturday. I'm excited!

It's amazing how much we go through as black women when it comes to hair. But I guess that's all just another part of us. It's important and it requires sacrifices. It's our crown and glory.

Thursday, December 20, 2007


Oh my goodness, I love my job! Why did Essence just have their fashion and beauty sale today??!! You know I went off! All 50+ African-American women in there were going off. Talk about MAD RUSH! It was so hot in that room, BUT it paid off! Mascara, Lip Gloss, Eye Shadows, Foundation, Hair Products, Candles, Scrubs, Self-Taners, Nail Polish, Cuticle Remover, Beauty Masks, Wigs (yes wigs), Curling Irons, Spa Robes... Motions, Chanel, Sally Hanson, Cover Girl, Clinique, Maybelline, Bobbi Brown, Carol's Daughter, L'Oreal.... These are some pretty no nonsense name brands right? So of course you would think, okay... a sale? j.a.c. You're still going to have to come out of your pocket for all of this stuff...


Think again!

Everything for $1!!!!!!!!!

What is it about makeup and beauty products that get women so excited? Why were we shoving and pushing each other to get to the lip gloss and eye makeup bins? What is it about Motions hair care products that send women rushing to the other side of the room to grab the last bottle of sheen? I don't know. But whatever it is, whatever this addictive drug is, I LOVED IT!

Wednesday, December 19, 2007

Do Nothing

"When you don't know what to do, do nothing."

I think that's one my staple principles in life. I've had to repeat it to myself more than usual since I moved to NY. There are just so many decisions to make. Where should I unpack that box, which accounts should I close, should I sell my car, if so when... My head's beginning to hurt. Actually, it already hurts. I'm especially tired today too. I didn't get my normal hours of beauty sleep and I'm really feeling it. My eyes are so heavy. But I'll be up soon. I'm going to see Erro tonight. He'll wake me up.

I can't wait until Friday. The office closes at 1pm and I'm on the 3pm train to MD. Having 5 days home with the fam is going to be nice. I miss my little sister. I feel like I haven't seen her in years. I can't even remember the last time I saw her. Aww. Pooh! =) My baby sister is graduating from college in May. It's common to say "I can't believe it!" but I actually can. She's been struggling in Oklahoma. It's so out of her element to be in the midwest. Who wants to live in the midwest?! lol.

Have a safe holiday season people!

Monday, December 17, 2007

Ran-Dumb Thoughts

I've been starving, so I'm glad it's lunch time. I'm eating leftovers. My favorite. I think it's the fact that you don't have to go out looking for something else and you're saving money and/or time. Instead, I'm already ready to go! And being as cheap as I am when it comes to food, I love stretching meals over two days. It's perfect!

*Grunt* I'm full.

I just looked over to my bulletin board and I have all these flight and train confirmations pinned up. I did the same thing at my old job. My "travel" wall was always filled with another confirmation. I stay on the road or in the sky. Unfortunately, none of them are ever extravagent, international trips, but I'm happy nevertheless. It's always great to see a confirmation that allows you access to visit your family.

I don't love New York enough to stay here. Apparently not one non-native New Yorker does either. I'm in NY for a career. Point. Period. Blank. It is not a place to raise a family or live for long extended periods of time. In order to live in a cold state, you MUST have a car. There are no if ands or buts about that. It's a requirement. So this New York thing is temporary. I'd live in LA or San Diego for the rest of my life before I'd live in any part New York. California is easy. I'm telling you, Californians are spoiled.

Guess who just popped up on my Pandora music player? Pink's first single. I used to love this song. "There you go. Looking pitiful just because I let you go." She was perpretrating a fraud on this entire CD. That girl knew she wasn't no R&B singer. But I guess she had to do what was best for her at the time...

Is anyone coming to concert? I'd love to see a performance at Madison Square Garden. If I were going to be here, I would see Chris Brown. I love that boy. I bet his concert is awesome! I should see him before he gets to be Usher's age and loses his abilities. Chris Brown can fly through the air now, but might have a little trouble when he turns 27!

Questlove, Erro and Teedra will all be at SOB's soon. Good stuff. I'll be on the cruise during Teedra's show. Darn! I actually miss Erro. I feel like it's been a while. Like I haven't seen my baby. Guess I'll be checking him out this Wednesday on my own. Don't feel like being bothered with asking other people to go see someone they're not familiar with. Cuz then I'll have to explain, and I just don't feel like it.

Bout to go to a meeting. Holla!

Friday, December 14, 2007

Pregnancy - A Fad?

"She's Pregnant!!"

Why is everyone pregnant (or a new mom)?!

Jessica Alba - newly pregnant
Nicole Richie - newly pregnant
Jennifer Lopez - expecting twins
Brittney Spears - with her 15th or so child
Halle Berry - finally pregnant
Tameka Raymond - new mom
Selma Hayek - new mom
Katie Holmes - Suri's mom
Angelina Joile - mom to a whole bunch of babies
Gwen Stefanie - new mom
Heidi Klum - new mom
(Mind's going blank. Fill in the rest.)

Who's next? Queen Latifah?!!

I mean, who would have thought that being pregnant, a diving blessing from God, would become nothing more than a mere fad!! Are these people really ready to be parents or are they just following the crowd? You tell me.

Lovin Life

Hey Blogworld,

How's life going? Are you staying upbeat and motivated in this crazy society? I'm asking because there's really nothing to frown about. You're alive. You have people around you that love you. You have a job that allows you survive. You have cute clothes in your closet. You can always find food. Your faculties are working. And you can make it from one place to another. Of course there's so much more to be grateful for, but you get the gist. A lot of times, when you go through your trials and hurdles, you forget about all of the great things. I know I did when I thought I was being tortured at my old job. I felt like I was going to die! It's funny how we always make things to be worse than they are. So when you find yourself doing that, sit down for a second, take a deep breathe, and thank Jehovah for all of the blessings that you do have. This is all much easier said than done, but I promise it'll bring you back to reality if you do.

I have so much to be thankful for. I can't believe how drastically my life has changed and how well I've transitioned. I'm happier than I have been in a long time and would change absolutely nothing about my life. Everything is perfect. Yes, even the long distance relationship. Granted it's only been a week, but I've never felt closer to baby boi. My love for him is stronger than ever. Working for Essence is fabulous. My commute is under 30 minutes. Money just seems to keep coming in. My family is right here. It's purely amazing. I feel like I can cry because of how magical everything seems at this moment. It's unbelievable. So... I resolve to live in this moment. To soak it all in and be happy regardless of all the crap going on around me. I'm living in a rainbow and I'm going to stay here as long as possible. I'm lovin life.

Keep your heads up ladies and gentleman. Live in your rainbow.



Tuesday, December 11, 2007

Good Morning New York

So I'm official. I've managed to move, settle in and start my new job. It's still all a bit odd to me, but that feeling will go away soon. You know what though? The one thing I've noticed since I've stepped off the plane is that everyone is so fabulously dressed! (That would be the first thing I notice huh?) The tailored coats, the bags and the boots..Oh My! I feel like I need to step my game up. And it doesn't help that I work at a fashion and beauty magazine. The caliber of grooming and dressing has increased! These people are SHARP! Do you hear me? SHARP. So yes, I must accentuate my wardrobe with long leather gloves, special accessories, the perfect headgear for every coat, special shoes, unique tights, and more fabulous bags. And of course, I must keep my hair done at all times. I'm feeling kind of pressured, but I love it. What girl who loves to shop wouldn't appreciate the pressure to step her game up?

On another note, I'm excited about what the future holds. I think this change is going to prove great. My relationship with baby boi will strengthen, I'll gain more experience in a field I admire, Jehovah and I will become closer, and my finances will be able to exhale. This is going to be good ya'll. Really good.

I hope all is well on everyone else's side. It looks like I'll be in before my manager and co-workers, so I hope to check in on everyone a bit more frequently. Bisou Bisou! (Kiss Kiss)

Sunday, December 02, 2007

My Send Off Soiree

So you know we had a ball right? =) It was one of the most memorable nights ever. I will miss the mess out of my LA family... Thanks to party planner JennWill, I'm leaving with the most vivid, happy and fabulous memories yet. I love you LA!

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Thursday, November 29, 2007

Is That You Snoop?

I saw this video twice yesterday. I love this. He's breaking out of the mold!

Last Day

Today is my last day! How exciting! Off to bigger and better things people!

Tuesday, November 27, 2007

Fashion Spot: The Sheath Dress

I am all about the sheath dress now-a-days. Sheath - shaped to the body with vertical darts, this classic style offers a straight and narrow fit. (definition by Nordstrom) I own not a one, so I think it's about time I added one to my wardrobe. I'm inspired by Sophia Loren and Audrey Hepburn. Look how bad these ladies where. Talk about CLASSIC STYLE!

You Go Sophia!

Fast forward 50 years or so and this is what we have. I LOVE these dresses.

And now... the divine Ms. Audrey Hepburn. There is no one like her.

Monday, November 26, 2007

NBC Series On Black Women

African-American Women and Where They Stand - 5 Part Series beginning November 26th

Throughout the week of November 26, "NBC News With Brian Williams" will take a look at the issues facing African-American women across our nation in a new series "African-American Women: Where They Stand." The series will cover a wide-range of issues from their role in the '08 Presidential race, to the increased health-risks that they need to be concerned about.

Monday's installment will discuss African-American women's progress in the education field. Nearly two-thirds of African-American undergraduates are women. At black colleges, the ratio of women to men is 7 to 1. And that is leading to a disparity in the number of African-American women who go on to own their own businesses. Rehema Ellis will talk to educators, students and businesswomen about why this disparity exists.

Tuesday, Ellis will look at relationships within the African-American female community. Many agree the gender disparity in education and business among African-Americans is having an effect on relationships that African American women have. Some even say the implications could redefine "Black America's family and social structure." In the past fifty years, the percentage of African-American women between 25-54 who have never been married has doubled from 20% to 40%. (Compared to just 16% of white women who have never been married today). Ellis sits down with the members of a Chicago book club and talk about this difference and how it impacts them.

Dr. Nancy Snyderman will discuss the increases risks for breast cancer for African-American women on Wednesday. Mortality rates for African-American women are higher than any other racial or ethnic group for nearly every major cause of death, including breast cancer. Black women with breast cancer are nearly 30% more likely to die from it than white women. Premenopausal black women are more than twice as likely to get a more aggressive form of the disease. And, not only are African-American women more likely to die from breast cancer, but they're less likely to get life-saving treatments. Dr. Snyderman will profile one of the only oncologists in the world who specializes in the treatment of African-American women with breast cancer.

On Thursday, Ron Allen will take viewers to South Carolina -- the first southern primary state -- and ask the question: Will race trump gender or gender trump race? In South Carolina , black women made up nearly 30 percent of all democratic primary voters in 2004. This year, polls show a significant number are undecided, torn between choosing the first African-American or first female Presidential candidate. Allen talks with the undecided, as well the state directors for the Clinton and Obama campaigns, who happen to be African-American women.

To close the series on Friday, Dr. Snyderman will raise the frightening statistic that African-American women are 85% more likely to get diabetes, a major complication for heart disease. And, like breast cancer, more black women die from heart disease than white women. Dr. Snyderman will profile a leading expert and a unique church-based outreach program in South Carolina that seeks to spread the word about heart disease risks to black women congregants.

Mara Schiavocampo, Digital Correspondent for "Nightly News," will address two hot topics in the African - American community: interracial dating and the impact of hip hop music on black women (For those of you who attended NABJ this year, Ms. Schiavocampo won the Emerging Journalist of the Year Award). Interracial dating is a growing trend in the African - American community. An poll found that 81% of participants approved of black women dating non- black men. According to a U.S. Census Bureau report in 2000, 95,000 black women were married to white men. In 2005, that number increased to 134,000. Schiavocampo will talk to experts about the trend and discuss how this defines the "Black family" of the future. poll found that 81% of participants approved of black women dating non- black men. According to a U.S. Census Bureau report in 2000, 95,000 black women were married to white men. In 2005, that number increased to 134,000. Schiavocampo will talk to experts about the trend and discuss how this defines the "Black family" of the future.

Check it Out!

Wednesday, November 21, 2007

Just Breath

Calling All LA Residents

Everything Must Go!

Do you know anyone who's interested?

Please pass this on!

Tuesday, November 20, 2007

Oh Shutup Oprah

Oprah's My Favorite Things episode comes on today; the episode where she gives all of her favorite gifts to the audience. Stuff like iPhones, diamonds and cars. You know...the stuff that only Oprah can give to 100+ people just for attending the show. I hate/love that show. I get mad watching it, but just can't seem to turn from it.

Here's some of the crap that the audience gets. I'm glad they didn't get iPhones, diamonds and cars this time around. lol. I'm so mean! =)

Have a good evening everyone.

Ran-Dumb Thoughts

Today's a brand new day, and to be honest with you, I can't wait for it to be over. These 9 excruciating hours at work seem to go by SOOOO slow. Honestly, there's no point in me being here, except to go on the lunch that my executive mentor is taking me on. But for a pass from work, I'd even give that up.

I was an absolute couch potato yesterday afternoon. Watching the Project Runway marathon was so calming. After PR, I watched a little Dancing With the Stars (which I can't really get into this season for some reason), Girlfriends, The Game and then The Hills. I love those shows. The Monday night line-up is great for me. There are so many shows on tv though. I have to put the shows in my phone as appointments just so I won't forget what comes on. What comes on tonight by the way?

The cruise is 2 months away. I don't want to shop for it but I may just have to. Although I must have a week's worth of fabulous summer outfits in my closet already. Most of the trip will be spent in a swimsuit and a cover up so I shouldn't need that much. As a matter of fact, I over-packed for my last cruise. I might just get a dress, a pair of nice linen pants and call it a day. I'm moving across the country in a couple of weeks for goodness sakes...without relocation there's not much money to spend.

Last night right after turning off my tv, I called baby boi. In old fashioned girlie-emotional-random style, I asked him how he felt about the relationship. His reply was, "It's straight." I swore I heard crickets while waiting for him to say more, which never happened. Then he said, "how do you know I'm in the right mind frame to answer your question right now?" Oh word?! Ha! Fine. That's Absolutely Fine. Ladies and gentleman, please answer this for me. Is it easier to "get in the right mind frame" and answer a pms-ing woman's question or spit out a annoyingly brief response worthy of the dirt on the bottom of my shoe along with a insanely ridiculous man-question? Yes, a man-question. There is such a thing. I guess this is the part where a man doesn't know how to express his feelings and a woman asks an out-of-the-blue emotional question with expectations. Such is relationships.

I have John Legend's "Once Again" ringing in my headphones. I haven't heard this in a while. It's a great CD but I'm not sure if it's what I'm in the mood for. I don't know what I'm in the mood for right now. Let's see what I have on my computer here at work... Do I want to hear a little Radiohead, Tank, Common, Roisin Murphy, Swizz Beatz...? There are too many options. Perhaps I'll go to Musicovery, which plays music based on your mood. Eh. Not really feeling that particularly because I have no idea what my mood is. Dah well. Johnny Boy it is.

I was freezing in bed last night! I don't know why I didn't put on some long pajama bottoms being that it's winter time. Tank tops and shorts do NOT cut it anymore.

I may not go to the meeting tonight. I know I should, but I just don't feel like it. It is only 7:36 in the morning. I have time to change my mind.

You know what I wish I was doing right now? Taking a ballet class or sitting in a photography studio reviewing my shots. Is anyone watching that reality tv show "The Shot" on VH1? The contestants take some amazing photos. I'm learning a lot. New York's going to be a great backdrop for my hobby.

I turn 25 tomorrow. You know what my mom said to me yesterday? "Wow. You're going to be 27 or 28 when you get married!" Lol. Thanks mother. =) Oddly enough, I'm willing to wait. Truth be told, I'm not ready to get married. I have a whole new life ahead of me. Plus, baby boi is no where near ready either.

I wish I could right forever considering I don't have anything else to do today. I might have to give 3 posts today to keep from dying of boredom. =) Holla!

Monday, November 19, 2007

A.Keys New Video

I posted this last Tuesday but the link was discontinued. Here we go again. GREAT video. GREAT song.

Friday, November 16, 2007

Tears of Joy

I'm almost in tears reading all of the caring and moving responses I've received from my "goodbye" email. I'm so amazed by how much energy and time people have spent expressing what I've meant to them and how happy they are for me. There are no amount of words to describe what I'm feeling right now. I'm so moved. So touched. So appreciative. So thankful.

Thursday, November 15, 2007

The Happy Grind

My family is about to drive me absolutely crazy. Lol. It's been 3 days since I accepted the job at Essence and I get four or five phone calls every single day asking me how I'm getting home, what I'm packing, what I'm selling, when my last day is, which family member I'm going to stay with.... AAAHHHHH!! Okay. I know you guys are excited but dag! My response is not going to change much from day to day so please, CHILL. I'm not leaving until the the 5th! =) I love my family.

On the real though, I have a lot to do. I'm filling out all these forms, digging up old tax returns so I can fill out my W-4 right, reminding myself to take my passport to work so I can photocopy it and send to Human Resources for proof of citizenship. Phew! Direct Deposit forms. References. Notaries. Leasing Office Notifications. Address Change Forms. This is a lot. My to do lists and calendar have to be TIGHT. I'ma try to get as much done as early as possible. Hopefully I'll have everything done even before my last day, so I can tigh up lose ends on my week off. Your whole mind frame changes when you give a job two weeks notice. I can't even focus on work. I'm too busy writing to do lists and answering my family members 150,000 questions! =) But these 2 or 3 weeks are going to go by REALLY fast. So it's off to the grind! A Happy Grind!

Tuesday, November 13, 2007

There's A Music Surge Now-A-Days

So Beautiful. Thumbs Up J.Holiday.

Lovin Lyfe's groove.

My Favorite New Song

Lady of Essence

I am the newest team member of Essence Magazine! Hooraaaayyyyy!!!!!!!!!!! =) After USAirways lost my luggage, which forced me to walk into the interview of my life without a suit on, makeup on my face, or bounce and curl to my hair, I managed to pull it together AND LAND THE JOB OF MY DREAMS! How amazing is that?! After a year of rejection from Mattel, Sony, Disney, and a whole slew of other con-j.a.c. companies, I have finally made it. I made it ladies and gentleman! I've truly made it!!!!

The stupid airline still has not found my luggage, but that's okay. I'm going to milk them for all they're worth. LOL. I itemized everything that was in my suitcase and it looks like they'll be giving me a fat reimbursment check. Yep! Most of my items were purchased from Banana Republic, Nine West, Victoria's Secret, Aldo, Macy's, American Eagle Outfitters, Ralph Lauren, H&M, Maybelline, Cover Girl and Revlon, so you KNOW I'm about to get paid. Can you believe that they are not liable for jewelry? My favorite birthstone ring...costume jewelry. Gone. They should compensate me for the emotional meltdown I had when they told me that my suitcase was lost! You know I cried. But once I realized that I had bigger things to accomplish, I refocused my energy. I had no choice!

The fact of the matter is that I got my job!!!! Nothing can stop me! Didn't Satan know?!! The Devil is messing with the wrong one!

New York here I come!!

Wednesday, November 07, 2007

To The Big Apple

Off to New York tomorrow for a quick in and out adventure. I haven't stepped inside that lovely city in quite some time. Has it been two years? I think so. I'm excited to be going back. To feel that busy, city energy pulsate through my veins. It's going to be great to see Nana, Aunt C., and Sean. I don't think I'll have a moment to see my college girls. I'm not really trying to plop my carry-on at my Nana's crib only to run out again. Gotta spend time with the woman, ya know? Good thing Nana knows Sean and he lives down the street. I'll still email the girls to let them know I'll be in town. Holla!

I'm On An A.Keys HIGH!

Let's go back there. Let's take it there.

When ya didn't know me. Didn't need me. Wanted to touch me. Couldn't leave me. I couldn't know how far this would go. I couldn't know if this was for sure. We just could not.

We just could not get enough of it baby...

Let's go!
Have that wreckless love!
That crazy love!
That off the wall won't stop til I get enough kind of love!
I need that love.

So baby Let's Go!
Have that wreckless love!
That crazy love!
That I don't really care we can have it anywhere kind of love!
That wreckless love.

-Wreckless Love

This song is CRAZY!

This Is Why I Love Music

Alicia Keys - Like You'll Never See Me Again

If I had no more time. No more time left to be here. Would you cherish what we have cuz we're everything that you are looking for.
If I couldn't feel your touch. And no longer were you with me. I'll be wishing you were here to be everything that I've been looking for.

I don't wanna forget the present as a gift. And I don't wanna take for granted the time you may have here with me. Cuz Lord only knows another day here's not really guaranteed.

So everytime you hold me
Hold me like this is the last time
Everytime you kiss me
Kiss me like you'll never see me again
Everytime you touch me
Touch me like this is the last time
Promise that you'll love me
Love me like you'll never see me again

How many really know what love is. Millions never will. Do you know until you lose it that it's everything that we are looking for.
When I wake up in the morning. You're the sun beam. I'm so thankful that I found everything that I've been looking for.

I don't wanna forget the present as a gift. And I don't wanna take for granted the time you may have here with me. Cuz Lord only knows another day here's not really guaranteed.

So everytime you hold me
Hold me like this is the last time
Everytime you kiss me
Kiss me like you'll never see me again
Everytime you touch me
Touch me like this is the last time
Promise that you'll love me
Love me like you'll never see me again

Monday, November 05, 2007

Reflections from "Get Yours!" - Part 2

Here's my take on the rest of Amy DuBois Barnett's book Get Yours! The Girlfriends' Guide to Having Everything You've Ever Dreamed of and More.

Get Your Money Right -
"I've found that the less I obsess about money, the more money I earn." "But earning is not enough. It's incredibly important for women to be independent and to have our own assets. Call your savings your "screw you" money. If you ever find yourself in a bad situation, personally or professionally, you have the ability to say "You know what? Screw you." Some people think wealth is about what you have. What you have more so talks to how much cash you have. Instead wealth means owning your own home. Getting all your bills paid off. Being able to send your kids to the best schools. Having a thick 401K ready for retirement. We've talked about this before in an earlier post, but I can't say it enough. Start investing. Build an emergency fund worth 6 months of your income. Sell some stuff. Take your lunch to work. Get a lower credit card rate. Know your credit rating. Stop sabotaging your savings... you know the deal people. "You deserve to live an abundant fulfilling life. Be grateful for what you have, work for what you want. Dream big and go for it!"

Get Him -
I thought this was a cute chapter. It dived into the issues that we women have to prevent us from holding on to good men. We often search for Mr. Exactly Right and ruin our chances of meeting a great guy. Let go of the list ladies. Accept imperfection. Amy also suggests that we stop believing in the man-shortage hype. She gives a great statistic about there being over 1 million extra men in 2010 in my age range and goes on to say this. "Besides, as a unique and exceptional woman, you don't expect the right man for you to be a dime a dozen. So quit complaining about how bad men are; that just invites bad men into your life." Priceless. She also recommends dating like a man - see a few different guys at once, end the phone call first, lean over and plant a kiss on him. You know how men love women to make the first move! In this same chapter she talks about how women are expected to be Desperately Seeking Stability (husband, kids, house in the burbs). That kind of hit me in the face because that's exactly who I am. But I learned a thing or two about celebrating my fun, fabulous years. She put me in check! The section concludes with an interview with Hill Harper which I was very bothered by...but I'll leave that for another blog.

Get Your Chic On -
Another fabulous section discussing how "beauty is temporary and fashion is transient, but sexy and stylish are forever." It's not about scoring that new pair of stilletos, rather it's about walking in them like you rule the world! HELLO! I'm finally figuring out my primary style. I've always had a style, but not that I have a job, I can afford the more expensive staple pieces that I adore. I absolutely have a NY sense of style. Nice tailored wool coats, a long pair of dramatic wide leg black pants, deep purple pumps. No more cheap clothes for me! Forever 21 is OUT (unless it's for jewelry or a cute hat)! Oh and don't underestimate the importance of shoes, bags and jewelry. Your accessories make your outfit. Believe that.

Get Your Personal Space - This was the chapter that helped me to see how much I disdain I have for my studio. Amy says "...I truly believe your living environment deeply affects you - spiritually, mentally, and physically. Your home can clear your head, soothe your soul, define your world, show your appreciation for yourself, and enhance your private and family time." My place does none of that. I not only wake up with a sore back and neck everyday, but I don't know the meaning of a light and airy space. It's so dark in my apartment and that's not good. Now I know what to look for in a place next time!

Get Creative -
I think this was one of my favorite chapters. Especially because of all the creative juices I have flowing within me. The quiz determined that I'm a creative inferno, which is great BUT I sometimes have trouble completing projects. So true. Here are some of the points Amy recommends. Turn off the TV. Identify your strengths. Tell yourself you're talented. Try something unusual. Spend time alone. Find others who share your interests. Consider profiting from your passion.

Get Spiritual -
This was my least favorite chapters. She has an idea of spirituality that is completely different from mine so I kept getting distracted as I tried to read through it. What I took from it though was that we all have a spiritual need. So supply it!

If you haven't already noticed, this book changed my life! I have so many quotes that I can't wait to write/type up for my personal use. Whenever I get into a rut, I know exactly where to go for motivation. Thank you Amy DuBois Barnett!

Thursday, November 01, 2007

Reflections from "Get Yours!" - Part 1

Amy DuBois Barnett's book, Get Yours! The Girlfriends' Guide to Having Everything You Ever Dreamed of and More, helped me so much that I've decided to jot down some ideas or points that I found inspiring. Hopefully you will find it inspiring too. Enjoy.

Get Happy - "It's impossible to really feel the good without the contrast of the hard and painful." Boy is that true. It's because of the hard knocks that I can appreciate all of the good in my life. How else will I know a great job from a horrible one if I've never had a horrible job? Would I be able to figure out that finance is not passion unless I tried it out and discovered that I hated it? Absolutely not. Like Amy says, life is a journey. I'll let her tell it. "...being able to understand challenges as experiences in one long adventure will change your whole attitude." It sure changed mine! "Real, deep happiness is not about immediate pleasure, it's about long-term gratification."

Get Out There - "Confronting your fears proves that you're living your life to its fullest potential - and that you're becoming everything you're meant to be." I've become overwhelmed with fear lately so this quote means more to me than I can explain. I realize that I can't shrink away from my fears like I have been. It only makes things worse. I'm finally ready to confront my fears and get out there. I promise to tap into my inner adventurer and get out there.

Get Healthy - In all of my stress and fear, I've managed to lose a lot of weight. That's not good. I realize that I don't need to exercise for a great body. I need to exercise for peace of mind. All the anxieties and worries of the day melt away when I exercise. So healthy food and exercise are in the new game plan. One piece of advice that stuck out to me was to establish a prebed ritual - reading, taking a bath, having a cup of caffeine-free tea... wonderful idea!

Get Great Girlfriends - I took a girlfriends quiz and my results say that I'm solid as a rock, however, I know that there are many things I can work on where girlfriends are concerned. It's really difficult to be a good girlfriend when you don't know how to befriend yourself. No one wants to be around a depressed, complaining soul, so take care of yourself first in order to love and listen to your girls. It's important that you're there for them as much as they're there for you. Expand your circle! There's no reason why I shouldn't have a girlfriend I can go to a ballet class with and another than I can tear up a mall with. No need to force your friends into community service activities when they'd rather be at the spa. Make new friends!

Get Your Family Together - Thank goodness I don't have any issues here. My sister and I are great friends and my parents are the best. I could expend a little more effort reaching out to my grandparents though. What's the harm in calling them up once a month and offering an update? A good tip from Amy was to chart your family tree. You made learn things you wouldn't otherwise!

Get That Gig - I had a phone interview yesterday, but didn't feel like I really got my point across that this was more than just a job to me. After finishing this book this morning, I was so inspired that I called my interviewer back and spilled my guts about the meaning of this job. And guess what? Even if I don't get the job, she now knows me. She told me that no matter if this opportunity works out or not, she'd love to keep in touch. Fantastic! I have already achieved success. "Be happy and success will come." Do an attitude check. Stop waiting to be noticed. Ask questions. Stop putting your work ahead of your personal life. Set your eyes on the next prize. Self-promote like a pro. Expand your skills. Learn to love networking. Ask for what you want. Know when to quit.

Good stuff right? Stay tuned for Part 2. I already wrote it, but I don't want to overwhelm anyone with too much stuff. =)

Tuesday, October 30, 2007

Things That I Love

city skylines
Rachel Roy's style
natural color palettes (burgundy, red, orange, cream, bronze, gold)
So You Think You Can Dance
discovering alternative music
spring or summer thunderstorms

VH1 Soul
my diamond stud earrings
thick long towels
trench coats and other fresh outerwear
having my spiritual connection in tact
"Gilmore Girls"
Mrs. Smith's apple pie and vanilla ice cream in a cup
romantic comedies
east coast character
simple classic wardrobe pieces
the idea of France, Italy and London (since I've never been)
being toasty and warm
white orchids and calla lilies
Alexis Phifer's clean look
short hair
flamenco and other Spanish dance styles
fall and summer
going to new places
school (for free)
leather bags
pinot grigio wine
city life
Victorias Secret
"The Best Man"
special moments with mom, dad and sis
warm sweaters
oversized off the shoulder sweaters
men with passion
things that give me goosebumps
glasses (sun and prescription)
walking the runway
my faux birthstone & diamond 3-stoned ring
black and white photography
the numbers 4, 7 and 14
clean fresh air
being up high
live music
writing stories, lyrics and personal thoughts
photo albums
old songs I haven't heard in a while
clothing that speaks effortless, elegant and classy sophistication
high-thread count sheets
big kitchens
engrossing books
being able to pay all my bills
learning who I am
eventful personal time
fun, spontaneous adventures in nature
riding over the bridge into Harlem
finding inspiration
candles and incense
stepping into the house I grew up in after a long time away
taking walks
music that affects the soul
mood lighting
being prepared

Tuesday, October 23, 2007

Turning Point #14

I co-created a performing arts program and taught dance classes for the Los Angeles community. I take photography classes and find joy in taking creative photos. I sit on the alumni board of a youth empowerment organization that promotes abstinence from sex, drugs, violence and racism. I had a ball working with New York City's Rockettes at Radio City Music Hall. I served as a member of the planning committee for the Emerging Leaders Summit at the Partners for Environmental Progress Conference. I find happiness in being involved with the Association for the Study of African-American Life & History's (ASALH) Youth Day. My best job was as a marketing intern for The Lincoln Center for the Performing Arts, Inc. in NY.

I am NOT a finance person.

Can you believe that I just figured this out today? I've been working in finance for the last 3 years and while I'm good at what I do, I hate it. I can crunch the mess out of numbers, but it bores me to death. So who exactly am I? Well from what I listed above, it seems like I'm some sort of creative, youth-oriented, passionate contributing member of society. I am project-driven. I'm an on my feet, active type of woman. Performing and fine arts are my joy. I'm in love with entertainment, fashion, magazines, and people-empowerment. I desire to save future generations.

I've never realized that I'm not where I'm supposed to be because everything joyous that I've done has been extra-curricular. I do it without thinking. I leave work and spend time taking pictures for fun. Going to an ASALH conference and being a role model for teenagers and young adults is just a mini-vacation. Just something that I do. Creating the performing arts academy was just a side project. Something to keep me entertained and to keep smiles on little girl's faces. Nothing big.


I can't believe I didn't see this earlier. Well...obviously I wasn't meant to see it earlier. I've gained valuable experience from a giant Fortune 500 corporation, and now I need to move on.

I swear... the minute I think I'm figuring something out, I'm turned upside down. My world as I know it doesn't make sense anymore. So now what? I definitely have to re-vamp the resume. Since I have no formal experience in the industry that I want to move into, I'm going to have to start at the bottom. Or am I? And just what is the name of this industry that I'm looking for? It's not pure entertainment because Lord knows I don't want to deal with the cut-throat, nasty mess that goes on in that world. How do I stretch what I've done into something that a company will view as valuable experience? How do I find a way to take everything that I've done for free and get paid for it?

Ok. Can I just tell you that this 24th year on earth is my most confusing, self-seeking, craziest, most lost, emotional year in my entire life!?!? This is so much work! Geez!

What a journey!!!

Monday, October 22, 2007

Ship Me Some Fresh Air!

These fires are out of control! I'm not even close to Malibu or the other areas "under fire", but man! My eyes are burning! The last time my eyes hurt this bad due to soot and dirt was on September 11th. Shooooo. It might as well be September 11th all over again! I was 100 blocks away from that catastrophe and still felt like I was dying as I breathed in contaminated air and looked through brown, dirty lenses (also known as my eyes). Here we go again! Can someone please mail me some fresh air?!

And now, all I can think about is the blue waters, clean beaches, and fresh air I'll be privy to in a couple of months...

Save me!

Monday's Blog

Today begins another week. Everyday that I drive to work, I say to myself "Make today count because today could be your last day." I also remind myself that there are people struggling due to the inability to get a job. It could be a lot worse. So here's to another 5 days... "A hero is an ordinary individual who finds the strength to persevere and endure in spite of overwhelming obstacles." - Christopher Reeve

I haven't felt the desire to blog lately, although I've been doing a lot of private journal writing. On Saturday, I wrote about being bored out of my mind. lol. I sat in the same spot from 10am to 7pm watching the entire season of So You Think You Can Dance. It was purely pathetic. I did cook and wash my comforter though. Two things I never find time to do.

Last Thursday, at the recommendation of author Amy DuBois Barnett, I listed the top ten things that frighten me the most. Some of my answers included missing out on the opportunity of a lifetime, disappointing someone, being stuck, and not living up to my potential. There are so many things that I have a true talent for (like photography and performing) that I feel I'll never get to do full time. Of course I shouldn't look at it like that though.

I can't wait to sip mimosas on the beach with my girlfriends. Our cruise is going to be fabulous. I keep looking at the week blocked out in my calendar as if staring at the word 'VACATION' is going to make it come faster.

I painted my fingernails black. It took some getting used to, but I actually like. Especially because they're so shiny.

Radiohead's album is wonderful. It's full of tranquility.

I took my car to get an oil change and found out that I need new brake pads. $245 worth of brake pads. If my Dad were somewhat close, he would do them for me. =( Lord, help me find a way.

I can't believe this. My Superhero Fire Fighting Dad is on leave for hypertension! (The fire fighter association's lawyer says he might be able to build a case so that my dad won't have to pay for blood pressure medicine for the rest of his life. So while he's building his case, my dad can't work.) It's so strange to see my dad aging. He's always been able to do everything. I've seen him scuba dive for victims, scaffle down syscraper buildings, and move unmovable items. He was such a man's man. This is so weird. I don't want my daddy to get old! (I have to get closer to him.)

November is here. Holidays are around the corner. Tis the season.

I received a $50 gift from work. I have to pick which store(s) I want to redeem the money at. I'm losing my mind looking at the options. Lord&Taylor, Macy's, BestBuy, Marshalls/TJMaxx, Lowes, Spas, Bed Bath and Beyond, Amazon, Applebees, The Limited, Foot Locker, The Sharper Image... oh my goodness!!! Should I spend $10 at Edwards Theatres and $40 into Bloomingdales? Or maybe $25 at Target and $25 at Pier 1? Or maybe all $50 should go towards an American Airlines flight. This is a disaster. lol. I need camera accessories. If only they had Samy's on here. Maybe I should by a set of luggage. I'll need that. I need hangers too. Bed Bath and Beyond has the hangers I want. I need to fall-eriz and winter-ize my wardrobe too. The Limited should have a good selection of sweaters. But I'm always in BestBuy and Target... sheesh! I need to think about this one. =)

Why is it that the week I buy groceries is the week we have food galore at work? I could have fed myself off of other peoples money all week!


The wedding was sensational. It was the best wedding I have ever seen in my life! Non-traditional, perfect mood lighting, a whole lot of Sade, the colors, the open bar, the food, the joy.... I was cheesing the whole time. You would have thought that I was getting married! =)

Tuesday, October 16, 2007

A Friday Wedding

I haven't talked to my old co-worker friend in a long time. I think it's been close to a year and a half. So when I emailed him to check up on him and his gf, it was a pleasant surprise to hear that he was engaged and getting married this Friday! I remember sitting at his desk talking about rings and proposal plans. He was so excited. It makes me smile just thinking about it. Well anyway, he invited me to the wedding so I'm going to go bask in their happiness. Take a look at the location of the wedding. (click here and visit the events section) Gorgeous huh? Congratulations Andre and Cynthia!

More and more friends are getting married! =O

Thursday, October 11, 2007

Quote of the Day

"Your lips are softer than a triple roll of charmin."


Lil Sis

As much as this girl gets on my nerves, I swear she's the best thing in my life.

Wednesday, October 10, 2007

Ran-Dumb Thoughts

Hey peeps. How's everything going this week? Anything new?

Guess what I saw while walking into my building. Some old, caucasian, construction worker guy in his truck banging "it's bone and biggie biggie" from his stereo. I loved it! It made me smile.

So someone hung a noose up on the office door of a professor at my alma mater yesterday. That pretty much made me sick. And it's homecoming weekend, so you know what's going to be on everyone's mind now.

I got all of my pictures into Picasa. Every single photograph I've taken since I've been in California is now centrally located. It was cute looking at all the pics from over the years. I'm getting tired of seeing them though. I guess the memories are still too close for me to appreciate them. The girls and I do have a lot of cute shots though.

I need to get back on my studies. Whenever I break from the normal schedule, it's hard to get back on. I'm going to the convention on Saturday so that might help kick my butt back into gear.

While I was away, my co-worker unloaded her responsibilities on me. Needless to say, I was shocked to see all the work when I got back. But for some reason I wasn't even mad. Maybe it's because she has to have surgery. =/

I'm having headaches a little more frequently than I care to.

I wonder what I shall have for dinner. Sometimes I wish had my mommy here. She would cook for me. At least until the novelty of seeing me wears off. When she gets tired of me, she stops doing stuff for me. Ha!

I turn 25 next month. I was sitting around a table full of college students and one of my Kiamsha peers turned to me and said, "dag J. you're getting old." lol. I thought that was funny and yet so true, but not true at the same time. My mom said that I'll be 30 in no time. 25 is so young though. But when it comes to having children and owning property, I feel like I'm behind schedule.

I'm looking forward to seeing "Why Did I Get Married?" Jenn, who doesn't like Tyler Perry, said she liked it which means I'll love it. It'll be a good discussion movie. I hope baby boi will have lots to say on it.

I have nothing to do when I get home today. Can you believe that? I wish I could catch up on my shows... The Hills. The Fab Life of Kimora Lee. Girlfriends. The Game. etc. .. but I don't have tivo. If I don't fall asleep first, I'll use the time to study. That seems productive. I could mop my floors too. Maybe I'll conquer the laziness to get that done.

We get 3 checks next month. Yipee! Perhaps I'll buy a MacBook. Or maybe I'll buy that $700 camera lens I've been wanting. Or maybe I'll pay off my credit card. Now wouldn't that be the responsible thing to do? My sister wants a credit card so she can establish credit. Baby sis. Let me tell you...There are plenty of other ways to establish credit. Hold off as long as you can from getting a credit card. They are the worst.

"We do this work not because it's easy, but because it's hard." I heard that this weekend at the Summit. I thought it was very profound.

Jenn what's up with some Sunday Night Football? We haven't chilled in a while. I'm still eating my sunflower seeds by the way.

I told the recruiter that I'd go to Atlanta if he found a stellar opportunity for me. In fact, I think it might be less abrupt if I went to Atlanta first and then perused my way to Charlotte.

I threw away all the promotions and save 25% on all items mail yesterday. I was scared to let them go, but I figured I'd do more damage with them than without.

My phone's screen went blank so they gave me a refurbished phone. Why does the "p" on my keyboard think it's the send button? I'm tired of having phones that don't work. I'm going to write Verizon a strongly worded letter. You would think a customer who pays her bill on time and has never been delinquet on her account would get good service. Actually, the service isn't the problem. It's the equipment. Very poor equipment.

Time's up. It's 3:41. Quitting time.

If you have a minute, drop me a comment and tell me something new. Thanks!

Changed My Life

For those of us outside of the environmental justice (EJ) world, what do you see when you think about a group of environmentalist? If you're anything like me, you see a group of hippie-looking, white people wearing khaki, cargo shorts and save-the-world t-shirts chained to a tree in the forest. Or you might see "green terrorists" running towards you with posters and stacks of statistics on why you're evil for wearing a leather jacket. Better yet, you could also see people with holes in their pants, colorful scarfs around their necks, and crazy uncombed hair on busy, city, street corners asking suited and booted business people to 'join the struggle'. Am I on point? So when Ms. Iantha and Mrs. Dunn asked me to participate in the planning committee for the Partners for Environmental Progress Summit's Emerging Leaders day, I was confused. "You want me to do what?" First of all, I know nothing about the environment and have no passion for EJ. Shoo, I don't even know what EJ is! Second, I'm scared of the "green terrorists". They'll kill me for not having the right light bulb! And third, I own crocodile pumps! Now you KNOW I'm not giving up my shoes.

So I'm sitting in the Emerging Leaders Summit like a fish out of water. I can't be myself...I have no idea what to say...terms and definitions are flying past my one on the committee looks like me...I work for a company that furthers war interests... It's just all around awkward. As the morning hours pass, more colorful people continue to join the group, but it's not until two gentleman from Morehouse stroll in that I begin to feel like I can breathe. I can't put my finger on why, but there's just something about having educated and environmentally passionate, black, college men join the conversation that made me feel better. But then I got annoyed...Can someone please tell me why are we never on time? Dag on black people. But anyway, the way I felt inside regarding the whole situation, you would have never thought that I went to predominately white schools all my life.

While a room full of my peers presented and discussed, I listened. I sat back, opened my mind, and listened (which was the best thing I could have done at that time). What I began to understand was that this wasn't about saving the whales or the polar bears. It wasn't about power plants and evil people like me who wear leather jackets and crocodile pumps. Instead it was about multiculturalism, racial harmony, active listening, partnerships, mutual respect, language and leadership. That's when I began thinking, "Okay Okay people...You're speaking my language now!" Once that bond was made, I was done. I could finally rescind my "green terrorist" label. =)

I quote just popped up in my work email. "It is our attitude at the beginning of a difficult task which, more than anything else, will affect its successful outcome." Ha! How ironic is that?!

Anyway, as I sat in seminars with the most diverse group of unified individuals I have ever sat with in my life, I was overwhelmed with feelings of unity, joy, and trust. I know it sounds very "hug-a-tree" and "we are the world", but liken it to this. I was just talking to Mikesee about the feeling you get when you're partying with friends from all different stages of your life and you take a minute to notice how happy, inclusive, and warm everyone is to one another. Everyone's in one place having a great time and feeling extremely happy. When you take that minute to pause and reflect on the unity in the room, it's like the universe is in complete harmony. That's exactly how it felt at the summit. Everyone was there to make things better (which just so happened to be environmental things) and to have a good time. One of the speakers mentioned how dangerous it is to underestimate the value of laughter and up-building activities. Playing a game such as two truths and a lie can honestly be the foundation for trust, honesty and partnerships as you get to know one another! It was brilliant! And there were tons of more brilliant comments to follow! But you guys know how I am. I'm all about peace, joy, love and goodness. Fruits of the spirit. Universal habits we should all cultivate. Wanting to just all get along. =)

So that's the story of how I was won over. You should see me. I'm all into EJ principles on working together, EJ definitions, green groups, etc. I'm trying to figure out how I can help further EJ initiatives, partner Kiamsha with environmental groups as well as include these initiatives into the Kiamsha to save electricity, buy only organic products, save the whales, plan a one man revolution against hog farming, preserve the wild life in the top 5 national parks... Ok... well maybe I'm taking it a bit too far, but I am motivated. You can be sure that I'm not quite as radical as some of my new friends are, but I understand their passion. Maybe it's because the lines between them and me are beginning to blur.

Below are a couple of notes I took... Now tell me that these points shouldn't apply to every organization, corporation, non-profit, boyfriend/girlfriend relationship and marriage...If anything, the environmentalists may have one up on organizations who don't have these principles in place... Hmm.

-promoting inclusion
-recruitment & retention
-fund development
-better definitions/language
-develop leadership
-communication ~ cross-intergenerational
-coherent partnerships
-personal relationships
-shared visions & goals
-mutual respect
-time set aside for fun
-furthering each other's agendas
-adequate resources

There's so much I want to say to those who had an impact on me, but I'll consolidate my thoughts and say thank you to all of the superstars who changed my life.

Tuesday, October 09, 2007

If You Know Me...

...than you know that I'm a big Jennifer Lopez fan. If you're a dancer, a wanna be singer, and wanna be star like me, pick up her album today. Have fun dancing in your divalicious outfit in front of the mirror. I know I will!

Update: I'm listening to Jennifer now. Would I recommend her album. In a word: No. I would not recommend her album...

UNLESS you are as enamored by her swagger as I am...unless you respect how hard-working this woman of color is...unless you like the sweetness of her voice...unless you appreciate dance music that will make you sweat...unless you are a girlie girl like me who relates to lyrics on love, walking in YSL shoes, moving your body, and staying together. If you are none of the above, Stay Away! Lol.

Wednesday, October 03, 2007

Gotta Lot To Do

*just putting some stuff on paper for my reference - this is an 'in j.a.c.'s head' post*

okay. my flight leaves at 1:15pm tomorrow. i said i would do a half a day but i don't know. it depends on how much i get done tonight. i'm pretty much packed but i have to wash my hair. that's going to take a couple of hours. i'd be straight if i didn't have to go out tonight. near bear is in town. gotta see my girl before she leaves. she did email me like 2 weeks ago. i may leave work early today. be home by 3. i think the cast of "why did i get married?" will be on oprah today too so that'll be perfect. yep, i'm leaving early today. stamped: DECIDED. i have my resumes, my business cards...i should probably get my speech together... who i am... what i'm looking for.. my skill set.. my qualifications... yeah, i'll write out the important stuff that i need to remember on the plane. this is my chance. i have to use this opportunity to the full. i'm staying in my business clothes the entire weekend. you never know who you're going to meet. this weekend is not for play. it's going to be so much work. 4 straight days of hard networking. being on my p's and q's. i'm going to need a vacation when i get back. unfortunately i get in at 8 something in the evening on Monday. since my body will think it's 11 something, i'll probably go straight to bed so i can be up for work the next day. oh what it is to be an adult. speaking of being an adult, i gotta make sure all my bills are set up for bill pay. okay. i think that's it.
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